Sunday, May 23, 2010

Other families of eight kids are doing just fine remaining anonymous

http://www.parentdish.com/2010/05/17/supersize-families-the-joy-of-having-8-plus-kids/?icid=mainaimdl3link3http%3A%2F%2Fwww.parentdish.com%2F2010%2F05%2F17%2Fsupersize-families-the-joy-of-having-8-plus-kids%2F

We often hear, if you had eight kids you would put them on TV too! Or, Kate has to put them on TV, to survive. Or, no one else can walk in Kate's shoes.

Well, four families with eights kids who don't have their own TV shows are walking in her shoes, and were recently interviewed by Parent Dish. There are other families with eight or more kids out there, that can be easy to forget when it sometimes seems like Kate acts like she owns the patent on eight. Here's a little taste of their worlds, and how they're managing without exploiting their children:

  • Elizabeth Foss of Washington, D.C., works from home as a writer so she can stay around the house. She even home-schools her eight kids. We say: There are plenty of other things you can do besides getting a job more than 2,000 miles away, or obviously, putting your kids on TV.
  • Most of the moms interviewed don't use babysitters. They can't find a teenager willing or able to watch all eight. Instead, they will have an "at home" date watching a movie together when the kids are in bed. We say: Fun and memories don't always have to be a luxury vacation.
  • The children help with tasks like folding laundry, but all the moms say they have to accept that the cleaning and housework will never be perfect. We say: Obsessive focus on the children being matchy-matchy, French braidy-braidy, and spotless, puts undue stress on the children to always be perfect, and takes time away from relaxing and just enjoying the your time together. Childhood is brief and at the end of the 18 years the ice cream stains won't matter.
  • Some of the moms say it just gets better as the kids get older, more fun. They don't want to keep them "babies." We say: There is joy and happiness and uniqueness to be found in every year of your child's life with the right attitude and priorities. Sometimes a 10-year-old is a lot more fun than a cutsie 3-year-old. With the 10-year-old you can have a conversation that starts to resemble adult-speak. That's FUN. Enjoy your kids, no matter what their ages. Don't constantly wish them to stay the way they are or to age the opposite direction. That also puts undue stress on a child to not just be themselves.

31 sediments (sic) from readers:

SchmeckyGirl said...

I'm exhausted just reading that article. I have a close friend with 8 children. I think multiples are harder at first but once they reach a certain age it's easier because they are no more babies to care for. They can all play together at the same level too. 6 six-year olds is easier than a newborn, and 1, 2, 3, 5+ year olds. IMO. Unless you plan to let your 6-yr-old raise your newborn... Which I don't agree with.

Irene S said...

So true so true!

Barbara said...

You know, to be fair, in the beginning when Kate had the 6 newborns and brought them home, I can't even imagine how hard that was, even with help. As the Mom you only sleep with 'one eye closed' during those days anyway. So, yeah, I give Kate a break on how hard it was in the beginning. But now, no way. She is rarely there, they are old enough to play without a lot of intervention and they are gone to school all day. She has plenty of breaks. And she is not a single mom. They have a father who lives close and is with them for days at a time while she is running around being a 'star'. She is not doing it all alone. The wonderful thing about most mothers is they find a way to work things out. Kate never figured that out, she prefers TLC to do her babysitting and paying for everything. She prefers to be anywhere that the kids aren't.

LisaNH said...

Great points!! I spent most of my childhood in a rural area where large families were the norm. 8-10 children in one home was not uncommon. And yet not one familiy in that area had a McMansion, babysitters or help. None of them were on tv either. Mostly the fathers worked in either logging industry or were farmers. Most of the Moms were SAHM. They managed to get buy with little money and very little space in their homes. And they didn't film their kids for the world to see.

That is why the hair on the back of my neck always stands up when I see someone defending Kart's by saying she has to support her kids and that is why she has to do what she does or act the way she does. Not true. Many thousands of people all over this country get by with large families that don't sell their children's childhoods and they don't need to be out in the public eye all the time.

SchmeckyGirl said...

Not sure where to post this:

http://www.myfoxphilly.com/dpp/news/local_news/052410-state-rep-to-offer-jon-and-kate-child-law

State Rep To Offer Jon & Kate Child Law
PHILADELPHIA - A Pennsylvania state rep will introduce a new child-labor law on Thursday inspired by Jon and Kate Gosselin.

Slideshows: Two Years Of Kate’s Changing Looks | Gosselins Vs. The Duggars | Field Guide To The Gosselins | Images Of The Gosselin Estate | Gosselin Top 10 Freebies

Rep. Thomas P. Murt of Montgomery County says the law is regarding Child Labor Laws related to the entertainment industry and based on April's Republican Policy Committee hearing on child labor.

Much of the focus of that hearing was on Jon and Kate Gosselin, TLC and witnesses who alleged that children were being exploited by such TV shows.

Right after the hearing, the state said the Gosselins and TLC didn't break any laws filing the show in Wernersville, Pa., and areas near Philadelphia, but they also needed to file some additional permits.

Murt says House Bill 2515 will propose "that advocates for minors to ensure their health, education, and moral safety are on all production sets."

The bill restricts work hours of minors to between 7 a.m. and 10 p.m.

It also requires all minors to have a work permits issued by the Department of Labor and Industry, and that 15 percent of a minor’s gross earnings shall be set aside by the employer in a trust for the minor.

Murt's hearing on April 14 drew some national press and some allegations from the Gosselin's relatives.

Lawyer Gloria Allred, child advocate Paul Petersen, and Gosselin relatives Kevin and Jodi Kreider testified, along with state labor-law enforcement officials

Murt said at the time he was concerned as a parent and also a certified teacher, and that the current Pennsylvania Child Labor Law is outdated.

“To put it bluntly, reality TV is not reality. It may be 50 percent, I’m not sure what percentage it might be, but reality TV is really not an accurate moniker,” Murt said.

“The entertainment industry has evolved and changed, and we believe our child-labor laws in Pennsylvania have not been updated in many, many years. With the advent of reality television programs, we believe we need to look hard at child-labor laws, to make sure children who participate in reality television programs are protected,” Murt said.

In general terms, the Kreiders said “reality TV” has changed over the past 10 years.

“Reality TV isn’t always reality TV. You don’t understand that. We have watched shows we liked in the past and it kind of puts a damper on it. Reality TV today really isn’t reality. And that’s the sad part. These kids are actually being scripted and it becomes more of a job, rather than their reality,” said Kevin Kreider.

Pennsylvania’s Child Labor Law does provide for the possibility of fines and even jail time, depending on which parts of the code are violated.

Pennsylvania state law permits children who are at least 7 years old to work in the entertainment industry, as long as a permit is obtained and certain rules are followed. The law also allows performers younger than 7 to have "temporary employment ... in the production of a motion picture."

PaMa said...

From myfoxphilly.com"



State Rep To Offer Jon & Kate Child Law
PHILADELPHIA

A Pennsylvania state rep will introduce a new child-labor law on Thursday inspired by Jon and Kate Gosselin.


Rep. Thomas P. Murt of Montgomery County says the law is regarding Child Labor Laws related to the entertainment industry and based on April's Republican Policy Committee hearing on child labor.

Much of the focus of that hearing was on Jon and Kate Gosselin, TLC and witnesses who alleged that children were being exploited by such TV shows.

Right after the hearing, the state said the Gosselins and TLC didn't break any laws filing the show in Wernersville, Pa., and areas near Philadelphia, but they also needed to file some additional permits.

Murt says House Bill 2515 will propose "that advocates for minors to ensure their health, education, and moral safety are on all production sets."

The bill restricts work hours of minors to between 7 a.m. and 10 p.m.

It also requires all minors to have a work permits issued by the Department of Labor and Industry, and that 15 percent of a minor’s gross earnings shall be set aside by the employer in a trust for the minor.

Murt's hearing on April 14 drew some national press and some allegations from the Gosselin's relatives.

Lawyer Gloria Allred, child advocate Paul Petersen, and Gosselin relatives Kevin and Jodi Kreider testified, along with state labor-law enforcement officials

Murt said at the time he was concerned as a parent and also a certified teacher, and that the current Pennsylvania Child Labor Law is outdated.

“To put it bluntly, reality TV is not reality. It may be 50 percent, I’m not sure what percentage it might be, but reality TV is really not an accurate moniker,” Murt said.

“The entertainment industry has evolved and changed, and we believe our child-labor laws in Pennsylvania have not been updated in many, many years. With the advent of reality television programs, we believe we need to look hard at child-labor laws, to make sure children who participate in reality television programs are protected,” Murt said.

In general terms, the Kreiders said “reality TV” has changed over the past 10 years.

“Reality TV isn’t always reality TV. You don’t understand that. We have watched shows we liked in the past and it kind of puts a damper on it. Reality TV today really isn’t reality. And that’s the sad part. These kids are actually being scripted and it becomes more of a job, rather than their reality,” said Kevin Kreider.

Pennsylvania’s Child Labor Law does provide for the possibility of fines and even jail time, depending on which parts of the code are violated.

Pennsylvania state law permits children who are at least 7 years old to work in the entertainment industry, as long as a permit is obtained and certain rules are followed. The law also allows performers younger than 7 to have "temporary employment ... in the production of a motion picture."

cherier1 said...

I grew up in a family of 8 and the older kids do help around the house and help with the other kids. Everybody has chores and contibutes to the family. It IS different when multiples are involved. I can not imagine have 3,4,5, or 6 toddlers to care for 24/7/365. Personally, I'd need to be sedated ;)

"The children help with tasks like folding laundry, but all the moms say they have to accept that the cleaning and housework will never be perfect. We say: Obsessive focus on the children being matchy-matchy, French braidy-braidy, and spotless, puts undue stress on the children to always be perfect, and takes time away from relaxing and just enjoying the your time together. Childhood is brief and at the end of the 18 years the ice cream stains won't matter."

I think the above is the key for most busy parents whether they have multiples or a couple children. Relax and enjoy! I used to be a perfectionist, and it was hard to let go of that, but my desire to be with my children and have a happy home won out!

My oldest just turned 16 and will be off to college before I know it!

I always put the housework etc second to being with my kids, and sometimes, frankly, the house is way out of control, but I'd rather be with them than cleaning and straightening etc. I will have a sparkling clean and highly organized house again when the kids are gone...

jibberjabbers said...

Well maybe those parents with 8 kids have responsible parents. And a mother who isn't a fame whore.

I remember reading about Kate being obsessed with the McCaugheys books and how she be read the book while she was in bed rest.

Obsessing over the fame they received.

kimmie said...

every family is different and i think it's a matter of choice what career or job a parent has.

but then, i don't fault kate for doing what she is to make money for the family. just as i don't fault the families listed above for their choices on careers, homeschooling etc.

SchmeckyGirl said...

kimmie,

I agree EXCEPT when the career is having your children's lives filmed.

The thing with Kate is... she sold herself to the public as being a stay-at-home mom to multiples. Once fame and fortune came into her life she realized she wanted to live like and actually be a celebrity. IMO.

kimmie said...

i don't understand...i was once a teacher. then a stay-at-home mom...then a teacher again. peoples' lives and situations change.

did anyone really expect kate to be a stay-at-home mom forever?

i know that kate did less staying at home even when she and jon were together. no one ever was on her case about it til they split up.

just as an fyi, i think (my opinion only) that at first they agreed about the arrangement. then i think jon wanted to be out meeting people, traveling etc. which i can totally get...lol.

NancyB said...

Kimmie said: i know that kate did less staying at home even when she and jon were together. no one ever was on her case about it til they split up.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh, Kimmie, that is not true! There were many hundreds of us that were appalled at her behavior towards her kids and Jon, the calculated wide spread and very lucrative grifting of the churches by both of them, initially up & down the east coast and then they expanded to the mid west & west coast. In mid 2007 it became obvious that she was gone more and more days each month (Before the marriage separation + divorce) many many people blogged about this, wrote articles etc. The hand writing was on the wall in mid 2007, IMO.

LisaNH said...

Well, Kate had enough money from exploiting the kids during the series and selling (not writing) the books that were published. She had the financial luxury to be a single SAHM and raise her children(Doesn't she at the very least owe them that since she didn't set up trust funds for them despite what they earned?). But instead she chose to have nannies raise them while she chased fame and spent their money at the tanning salon, having her nails done, buying expensive designer clothing.

disgusted in pa said...

kimmie--
No, I don't think anyone expected Kate to be a stay-at-home mom forever--some of us thought she should go back to using her nursing degree. She could have worked shifts/part-time. Also, if she had wanted to, she could have paid off the mortgage on the old house with the money made from the show. The family fame would soon fade
and they could've lived a little more "normally."
Kate kept putting herself and the children in the spotlight so she could remain famous and live the lifestyle to which so desperately wanted to become accustomed. She does not want to fade into obscurity and become an "average" working mom, with a middle/working class income and lifestyle. THAT, IMO is why Kate feels she "has to" go on fame-whoring and pimping out her children.

cherier1 said...

7AM - 10PM?????

Go Murt! BUT, there must surely be a restriction on hours per day, consecutive hours, total hours etc.

SchmeckyGirl said...

Sorry kimmie, I replied to you in the most recent post. I saw a post you made about Jodi and Kevin and again can't find it. You posted it like it is a fact they made money from RadarOnline and that it is a fact that it is how they paid off their house. We don't know know any of that for sure. How does anyone know how they paid off their house? Maybe they remortgaged it for a lower rate and they have a new mortgage? We don't KNOW anything.

Administrator said...

There is no proof that this was anything but a refinance. But let's assume they did pay off their house with money from this interview? Sooo...Kate and Jon are allowed to make money off the kids and move into a mansion, but Jodi, who has had an active hand in raising them, watched them for free countless times, totally supported the family in their exploits and sacrificed her own family's privacy to do so, isn't allowed a dime? My kids, my money??? I can exploit my kids but nobody else better?

The double standard is absurd. If Jodi is not allowed to make money off the kids, Kate and Jon are not allowed either.

SchmeckyGirl said...

Cherier1,
I know! 7am? Most JOBS don't start until 9am and 10PM should be past most minors bedtimes. Odd.

LisaNH said...

Administrator said...

The double standard is absurd. If Jodi is not allowed to make money off the kids, Kate and Jon are not allowed either.

__________________________________________

Well said! I couldn't agree more.

Administrator said...

I've been thinking about doing a post to refute all this garbage and Jodi and Kevin.

Also to the blog saying Kevin lied....just so they know, that's libel! What did he lie about? You better hope he is lying so he doesn't sue you. You can't go around accusing people of lying, affairs, other bad things like that, without expecting a defamation lawsuit. If they can track you down.

SMB said...

Admin,
They are saying Kevin lied/"fabricated" because that is what a news article about him reports:
http://www.limelife.com/blog-entry/Gosselin-Kids-Allowed-To-Appear-On-Kates-New-Show/42514.html.

I understand your warning about libel, but I'm having trouble with where he would get his special damages. No prospective employer or client in his construction industry job would be reading at a Gosselin blog (or at least it is VERY unlikely). It's also slightly arguable Kevin is a public figure and would have to get around the actual malice barrier.

Administrator said...

He claims Kevin's testimony was poor and he fabricated some of it.....what about it was poor? I thought it was a very detailed and easy to understand account of child exploitation.

What part did he fabricate??? I love how he doesn't even name one example. The story about Christmas? About how they weren't paid? Just curious what of it was a lie....

Crickets.

SMB said...

None of us know which part was a lie, because we don't know the behind-the-scenes truth. I was assuming this journalist had done his research.

Administrator said...

This BLOG post by the way was written almost a month ago, not sure why it is being reposted now. Don't assume a journalist checks their facts. She has posted a bunch of nonsense as "facts" without one source to back it up--where are her sources??

The author is not a journalist. She doesn't even have a degree in journalism--look at her resume posted on her web site. I was only a journalist for a few years and I have more experience than her including an actual journalism degree and experience at real hard news publications. Her degree is "communications" which is college speak for a b.s. liberal arts degree you can take anywhere and be anything with. Her journalistic career consists of bungee jumping on the Rachel Ray show and writing for Home and Garden. So for her to say they are lying when no one really knows what happened behind closed doors is at best a mistruth and at most libelous. She says they are lying but does not say what about or give examples. And if they are lying, why hasn't Kate sued them? She has enough money to. Shut them up if they are lying. Jodi would be taking a huge risk to LIE about someone who is a millionaire and could wipe her clean with a lawsuit. Except, maybe Jodi isn't lying??

She also claims a "judge" said the kids could be filmed?? And that a court will reconvene in six months. Who, what, where and when? We have not heard one report about a "judge" ordering filming or any kind of reconvening in six months? Where is this coming from? Resuming filming was privately arranged through Jon and Kate by TLC. A judge does not control filming of these kids. There is an administrative permit process which is a joke, which the apparently complied with. Has nothing to do with a judge. This article is jibberish.

Stephanie said...

Haha. My undergrad was in Communications. As part of my degree, we could specialize in journalism, PR, advertising, film and video, photography, or theater. Or, we could just get the full degree in any of those things.

I agree with what you're saying about the article not fully passing the "smell" test. I almost wonder if the author was actually mixing up Twist of Kate and Kate Plus Eight. I had not heard anything before the article about a judge being involved, but I figured it was a state ALJ who reviewed the Labor Board's decision, or something along those lines.

Administrator said...

Why is nooobody else reporting about the judge? This is just a flat out lie.

Name the judge, name the court, name the county. Name the hearing date. Name the next court date.

Agreed, didn't pass the smell test. It STINKS

Administrator said...

Oh, the communications major also says that Kevin was in COURT. It's not COURT. What a dummy.

It's a fact-finding HEARING to gather information to possibly draft a new law...not a court. Has she not heard of congretional hearings?

Stephanie said...

Haha. My undergrad was in Communications. As part of my degree, we could specialize in journalism, PR, advertising, film and video, photography, or theater. Or, we could just get the full degree in any of those things.

I agree with what you're saying about the article not fully passing the "smell" test. I almost wonder if the author was actually mixing up Twist of Kate and Kate Plus Eight. I had not heard anything before the article about a judge being involved, but I figured it was a state ALJ who reviewed the Labor Board's decision, or something along those lines.

Administrator said...

He claims Kevin's testimony was poor and he fabricated some of it.....what about it was poor? I thought it was a very detailed and easy to understand account of child exploitation.

What part did he fabricate??? I love how he doesn't even name one example. The story about Christmas? About how they weren't paid? Just curious what of it was a lie....

Crickets.

Administrator said...

There is no proof that this was anything but a refinance. But let's assume they did pay off their house with money from this interview? Sooo...Kate and Jon are allowed to make money off the kids and move into a mansion, but Jodi, who has had an active hand in raising them, watched them for free countless times, totally supported the family in their exploits and sacrificed her own family's privacy to do so, isn't allowed a dime? My kids, my money??? I can exploit my kids but nobody else better?

The double standard is absurd. If Jodi is not allowed to make money off the kids, Kate and Jon are not allowed either.

kimmie said...

i don't understand...i was once a teacher. then a stay-at-home mom...then a teacher again. peoples' lives and situations change.

did anyone really expect kate to be a stay-at-home mom forever?

i know that kate did less staying at home even when she and jon were together. no one ever was on her case about it til they split up.

just as an fyi, i think (my opinion only) that at first they agreed about the arrangement. then i think jon wanted to be out meeting people, traveling etc. which i can totally get...lol.

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