Thursday, October 21, 2010

'Rocky Horror' actress keeps parenting separate from fame

"Wow. OK. The kid does not want me to be on TV. And it's all about what her classmates would think. What I came to accept was that my kid wants her life to herself. She wants to go her own way, and she doesn't want me inserting myself into her world."

Dori Hartley had a fabulous blog post detailing raising her daughter decades after Mom's fame on 'Rocky Horror Picture Show,' and keeping it all distanced from Mommy duties and a child who just wants to be a child, not the daughter of a celebrity. She gets it, it's not all about her. Kudos.

Recounts Hartley:

When I heard that "Glee" was doing a Rocky Horror episode, I half jokingly blurted, "I can't believe they didn't ask me to do a cameo. I mean, come ON. They could have had me pitted against Sue Sylvester. I could have been her dark nemesis." (Which, by the way, would have been fabulous.)

Well, you don't know what terror looks like on a child's face until you tell her that you'd like to appear on a major network series. "No! Mom, no! You can't! Please, Mom, if they call, please don't go on "Glee." All my friends watch it." Wow. OK. The kid does not want me to be on TV. And it's all about what her classmates would think. What I came to accept was that my kid wants her life to herself. She wants to go her own way, and she doesn't want me inserting myself into her world. Sounds familiar.

I was only a teenager when it all started happening for me. Only a few short years older than my daughter right now. I was a kid on the cover of magazines, interviewed by the top television hosts of the day and I was endlessly photographed. I met dozens of celebrities and I performed for them all. I knew no such thing as competition, nor did I feel the need to climb to the top, simply because I created the precedent. I was the top. And, for a few years, I was the reigning Queen of the Misfits. I ruled a part of New York City with a goth-punk flare and a glam touch. Suffice it to say, I went my own way.

And so, my feeling is that my daughter will get around to it eventually. Until then, it's just a jump to the left side of the kitchen, where the big show tonight is all about macaroni and cheese. No meatloaf.


http://www.parentdish.com/2010/10/19/rocky-horror-glee-dori-hartley/?icid=main%7Cmain%7Cdl3%7Csec1_lnk3%7C179023

51 sediments (sic) from readers:

Administrator said...

It's not very common to see a celeb displaying zero narcissistic tendencies. Most of them have at least a little bit. Hollywood is, after all, about attention. People who crave that attention are drawn to it. This is one of the most unselfish stories I've ever heard from a celeb.

Bodyguard my a$$ said...

That's a lovely and pertinent story, Admin. I have to say that your blog reaches new heights daily. I'm very impressed.

Oh, how I wish the G8 had a birth mother with just one shred of Dori's insight, or just plain dignity.

If Khate really was infertile, there's a darn good reason for it. Kids deserve to be cherished and have their mother's face just ooze with love for them and joy at seeing their faces. Those poor kids deserve So. Much. Better. (I know, understatement of the year)

Their lives are a travesty and a tragedy in the making. It really is like witnessing a slow-speed car crash. I hope I don't witness how all these lives play out. It's just so heartwrenching.

How can so much mental illness and personality disorder live in one person? I've sadly witnessed mental illness and personality disorders, but never such a complete package as we see in Khate. She's one scary sociopath. I hate to even imagine the pain in those kids' hearts. How they don't wet themselves when she goes off on them is a mystery to me. Like that scene (I think it was you who showed it) where they have to list the order to eat their lunches. That voice and that look on her face scared me, and I'm older than her! I can't imagine being a child experiencing that hatred daily. In what world does someone think that's not only ok, but ok to do in front of a camera and crew? I shudder to think what we don't see.

To all the nannies, housekeepers, TLC camera crews: Shame on you for not telling the truth about this woman and protecting those kids. There's no confidentiality agreement on this Earth that would keep me from exposing her abuse and protecting those children.

To Jon: You have eight little souls in your hands. Their pain is all on you. You made eight children with a sick, evil woman. I don't know what you were thinking, but now it's all on you to protect them. Their mother is going to destroy them if you don't do something drastic. It's not all about the filming. It's what they live with on a daily basis without you there as a buffer. I have male family members who have been abused like you; I've seen what it does to a man. But it's time to boss up. You are the only hope those kids have.

Thank you, Admin, for giving us a place to express our pain and anger. I know there are countless children being abused in this country, and it's all so very sad. But this is happening right in front of our faces, to children whose names we know, and it's just unbearable sometimes.

A Pink Straight Jacket For Kate said...

Good for her :o)

Now, she is a good example of responsible
parenting.

I LOVE ROCKY HORROR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My favorite scene is; Frankenfurter coming down in the elevator while stomping his hooker heel.

Frankenfurter turns around and sings: "How do you do? I see you've met my faithful handyman".

LUVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV it!

Thanks for the memories, Administrator :o)

Administrator said...

I just love stories of normal, grounded celebs. It debunks this idea Kate appears to have in her head of how they really live. They do not live how Kate thinks they live.

Linda in NS said...

My favorite scene is; Frankenfurter coming down in the elevator while stomping his hooker heel.
-----------
A Pink, you don't suppose Frankenfurter is where Kart got her (non)sense of fashion do you. She wears hooker heels too:))

Anonymous said...

Admin, Approximately midway in Cindy Adams' column(New York Post) today, she quotes you-know-who with a observation.

Anon 1 said...

Admin, while I've never heard of this lady, kudos to her for not only *listening* to her daughter, but *hearing* what she said.

I think that article posted by Irene yesterday, at Paul Petersen's AMC, was a perfect example of what the G8 will be dealing with in the not too distant future. The story needs to be somewhat shortened, but it is excellent. It's about Jena Malone, who has starred in a no. of movies. I recognized her from Stepmom, but I've seen her in numerous other pics. It's a long read, but really excellent, she had to declare emancipation from her mom at 14, to save the monies she was earning...sadly, I think her mom loves her, but she was lousy at handling money. Would it be possible to have this article, maybe in an abbreviated version, as a thread? It's definitely a must read.

http://www.minorcon.org/malone.html

brittanylopez said...

Kate is a horrible mother. I honestly can't understand how anyone can look at her on te show and think,"Now that's a good and loving mother." Kate is reprehensible, IMO. She needs a reality check, and SOON.

AuntieAnn said...

Anon1 - ITA. Kate's days as a "celebrity" are numbered. There will come a day when the G8 won't be marketable anymore, if it isn't already here, and she'll have to face a real life dilemma. If she was an actor she could find roles, if she was a writer her books would sell. If she was a chef she could find work at a Nobu somewhere but she's got nothing going for herself. She's relied on her kids to support her thinking it would never end. She's going to find herself in the same position as Jon - unemployable.

SchmeckyGirl said...

That's funny that her child was upset about it and the mother/actress is so unrecognizable when in character. Imagine how much worse it is for the Gosselin kids. Their mother is very recognizable and usually dresses to bring attention to who she is.

A Pink Straight Jacket For Kate said...

Linda in NS said...

A Pink, you don't suppose Frankenfurter is where Kart got her (non)sense of fashion do you. She wears hooker heels too:))

***********************************************

Hey Linda :o)

That's TRUE! Frankenfurter wears them better, though...

;o)

I wonder what her costume will be this Halloween?...

Background Checks . . . yeah right! said...

Just one of Kate's former nannys?!!??


Retail theft
Ariel Cantara, 20, of Phoenixville was arrested June 2 at 12:27 p.m. and charged with retail theft after she was seen transferring merchandise from a plastic handbasket to her open purse and leaving the Pathmark store without paying for the items.



http://www.mainlinemedianews.com/articles/2009/06/11/main_line_suburban_life/news/doc4a3001a79802b426849789.txt

silimom said...

Kate said that cellphones should charge just like toothbrushes? Huh?

From Cindy Adams' blog in NY Post:
Kate Gosselin, clutching a new Palm Pixi: "Cellphones should charge just like toothbrushes." And if you understand that remark, you're a better man than I am, Gunga Din . . .

Umm...Kate...They kind of do already charge just like toothbrushes. I have to plug in my sonicare to charge it. I have to plug in my iPhone to charge it. They're not that different.

If anyone gets this comment and wishes to enlighten me, please do so.

dee has had enough... said...

Lisa Marie Presley is on Oprah today talking about Michael Jackson. Oprah asked Lisa "When your as famous as you and Michael are, growing up that way, are you ever normal?" She said NO. She also talked about how she shielded her kids as much as she could from the paps/media/etc. until they were ready for it. Kate, you should be listening....

IDModo said...

Bodyguard my a$$: I don't think you meant to imply that people who are infertile are that way because they would otherwise make bad parents.

Having said that, I agree with you completely about Kate!That was a really good post!

Anon 1 said...

silimom said... Kate said that cellphones should charge just like toothbrushes? Huh?
~~~
It's KATE...'nuff said.

Midnight Madness said...

She also talked about how she shielded her kids as much as she could from the paps/media/etc. until they were ready for it. Kate, you should be listening....

--------------------

"Until they were ready for it?" What does that mean? At what age was that? Kate would say that her kids are ready for it now.

PA Mom ALSO said...

Just one of Kate's former nannys?!!??
---------------------


The arrest happened in June of last year. According to the latest issue of Life and Style, the nanny quit (but it doesn't say when), leaving Kate without a nanny. In April, she was a manager at a bakery/restaurant near Philly, so she could't have been a nanny for too long.

SchmeckyGirl said...

So I tweeted Jon and he replied...
SchmeckyGirl @jongosselin1  Is what Sylvia LaFair said true? Why is she speaking on your behalf?​

jongosselin1 @SchmeckyGirl If it doesn't come from me or this Twitter, it isn't true....

Betsy said...

Oh where Oh where has Kartzilla been hiding lately? We haven't seen Waldo for weeks since her bikini spread on the beach and she hasn't been pictured coming out of her UPS store. The packages and freebies must be piling up. I think since the rumors started about her and Waldo on the net and gossip sites Mrs. Waldo has put her husband on a leash.

Totallydisgusted said...

So in regards to the nannys. Does Khate just hire them off the street or do they come from an agency? Does she check their background or references? What does she really know about the people who are watching her kids?

very interesting said...

Seems like nanny 101 from the Gosselin house has quit, and she is talking too. Found it in Hollywoodlife.com

Laura D. said...

IDModo, I wish my husband was home and not out of town or I'd ask him, but he's a big fan of "Natural Selection" by Darwin. By this theory poor gene pools are naturally drained thus weeding out the bad seeds of the human race. You can look it up if you have time.

Bodyguard my a$$ said...

IDModo, I was only referring to Kate being infertile for a reason, if she really was. She is a species unto herself. Sorry if anyone thought differently.

Anonymous said...

very interesting said... Seems like nanny 101 from the Gosselin house has quit, and she is talking too. Found it in Hollywoodlife.com
~~~
Could you please post a link?

Crabitha Codswallop said...

Admin, what are your thoughts about Sylvia?

Anonymous said...

FWIW - found this at GWoP, makes sense.

Sshh said...
The industry rumor is that Kate is history. I heard that there is only one episode left and unless it gets outstanding ratings, the show is over. I don't work for TLC, but that is what is going around a certain production company.

Crabitha Codswallop said...

I think I read that the Sister Wives show had 2.7 million viewers for its last show. I'm sure Kate was SO happy for them.

Kate is not over yet, IMO. She will not give up or give in to being anything but a star, not without a fight.

She'll keep coming back, again and again. But each time it will be a weaker and less successful attempt. I don't see her ever giving up. She is not going to leave the spotlight in a gracious manner.

Administrator said...

Once Gosselin news finally dries up, God willing soon, I'm thinking of transitioning the blog into doing more news like this. News about bad celebrity parents and good celebrity parents and anything of note about kids in the business in general when it comes to kids being treated well vs. not well in this industry. Is there interest in that?

Administrator said...

Crabitha Codswallop said... Admin, what are your thoughts about Sylvia?
***********
I don't know it's weird. She's claiming to be writing this book with him and is making statements about the situation, and Jon is going around saying only believe what comes from my official twitter! Odd.

Crabitha Codswallop said...

Admin, this is a great site and it will fun to watch it grow and transition as the Gosselin family fades in and out of the news.

Bubbles said...

I've seen part of one episode of Sister Wives; it was recorded on my Tivo under the name of another program in error so it wasn't even intentional but I decided to watch a few minutes of it. I was truly disgusted by it - that man is an egotistical narcissistic jerk who thinks he's SO great, and the pain in those women's eyes makes me feel sick to my stomach. The "new" wife seems to think she's really something special.

In my opinion, the children on this show really need someone watching out for them because not only are they being exploited/embarrassed/humiliated on national TV, they're living in a warped reality to begin with.

When daytime talk shows and some reality shows started, I liked that you could get a glimpse of other people's lives and it helped people realize they weren't alone. No one is perfect and lots of people struggle with different issues. But these shows quickly went downhill (think Jerry Springer) and have really reached all time lows thanks to TLC. It's bothering me so much that children are being abused every day all across the country, but it's bothering me even more to see it being FILMED and having people in authority saying it's OK!

Marie said...

I wonder if the Gosselin children will ever get to go trick-or-treating with their friends like every other child will get to do in a few days time? Wonder if they've ever gone. Other than carving pumpkins once when they were little. I always used to look forward to Halloween as a kid, and since I bought some today to pass out to the ones who come to my door, just made me wondered if this is not a opportunity Kate has allowed tehm to have, even though its pretty much FREE!!

Linda in NS said...

A Pink Straight Jacket For Kate said... That's TRUE! Frankenfurter wears them better, though...

;o)

I wonder what her costume will be this Halloween?...
------------------------
Whatever it is it won't be half as scary as the Kate in her everyday "costume". BTW you're totally spot on when you say Frankenfurter wears the hooker heels better!

Hippie Chick said...

1st off...LOVE Rocky Horror Picture Show. My friends & I get together every year & watch it. We dress up like the characters, etc. We may take it too far, but it's a classic. We always fight about who gets to dress like Magenta. The guys fight about Frakenfurter. OK...I applaud Hartley's actions. Most celebrity mom's have good heads on their shoulders & want to protect their kids. Kate will never learn. It's catching up to her. Where is she? I'll go out on a limb & say that she's done. Too much waiting between shows is not a good sign, if there is a show. She's the bad guy now anyways. Good. Just what we've been waiting for. Buh-bye.

Sooverit said...

Regarding Dori Hartley's blog post: It certainly seems like she's done the right thing by respecting her daughter's wishes that she (Dori) stays out of the public eye. However, what if the producers of Glee HAD called Dori and asked her to be on the show? Would she have declined out of respect for her daughter? I'm just saying, I would have been more impressed if Dori had actually turned down an offer. It's easy for her to say she's keeping a low profile for her daughter's sake - would she continue to do that if she got the chance to re-ignite her fame? I don't know anything about Dori. I'd never heard of her until the post about her. I just noticed she said,"I can't believe they didn't ask me to do a cameo." I'm a skeptic. Would she have been as tuned in to her daughter's dismay if the offer had actually been made? I hope so, but I'm not convinced.

Virginia Pen Mom said...

I've also seen some of "Sister Wives" on On Demand. (As a rule, I haven't watched TLC in 8 months or more except for this.) At risk of giving them more publicity, I have to say this:

Like Bubbles, I was appalled. This is TLC's next blockbuster, next trainwreck, and next exploded/exploited family.

According to various articles:

* two ex-husbands and the family's pastor and church are upset about the filming.
* Two or three of the sister wives are also unhappy about Cody (the husband's) preening for the camera and about the addition of Wife #4 (the so-called "break-out" star).
* And Utah is thinking of slapping a felony on the family for flaunting illegal polygamy--otherwise rarely prosecuted.

In this case, some 17 children are involved in the coming ugliness. But Cody obviously loves the attention.

I was thinking, well, the unhappy wives will get out of the situation and not film...and then I remembered Jon Gosselin. They're trapped if they change their minds and so are the kids. It's all very familiar.

Bodyguard my a$$ said...

Admin, your post about the focus of this site shifting once the Gosselins are out of the spotlight made me finally believe the unthinkable. Kate could finally be finished!

People say she won't go down without a fight, but really, what can she do? Other than possibly a couple weeks of of sobbing and blaming Jon, she'll have nothing to offer. Why would any show even book her? We spent, what, seems like years listening to her sob story the last time the show was pulled.

Funny how she kept crying about the show last year, that it ended too soon, but didn't mention much about the marriage ending too soon. She's weird as hell, and completely tone deaf. I finally believe she's finished.

I don't think she's hiding from the pap; I think he quit making money off the same, boring lot lizard shots. He's probably in New York stalking Michael Douglas.

dee has had enough... said...

Midnight Madness said...Until they were ready for it?" What does that mean? At what age was that? Kate would say that her kids are ready for it now.

Early adult hood (late teens, early twenties)...Lisa Marie has always been very private. She has been living overseas for many years now. She said she moved there to get her kids out of the rat race of hollywood. She said an article in one of the rags about which "3yr old wore it best" was what made here leave. I honestly do not remember seeing very much about her or her kids over the years with the exception of when she married MJ and even then, I don't remember her kids being showcased very often if at all. This was the only interview she's ever given about MJ and she said she was doing it to get it out of the way so that it did not over shadow her new albulm that will be coming out next year.

Anon 1 said...

Sooverit said..
Would she have been as tuned in to her daughter's dismay if the offer had actually been made? I hope so, but I'm not convinced.
~~~
Excellent point. While we won't know, it does make you wonder just how she would have handled it if the offer had come.

Bubbles said...

Admin, I like the idea of the blog going in the direction of good/bad parenting, whether it's celebs or just regular people. Unfortunately, I still don't quite believe the Gosselin fiasco is over.

Administrator said...

Actually given everything else she said in this article I think she would have turned down the role if it made her daughter that upset. It's very clear from her blog that she puts her child first over her own vanity.

Alex said...

Sooverit--I am Dori's husband and yes, she would have respected her daughter's wishes. Her life revolves around those she loves, her "inner circle" and her daughter and I are at the top of that list. She's one of THE best Mom's I know and she has a great head on her shoulders. She's also raising a wonderful daughter... :-)

Thanks for posting a link to her article, Admin! She writes at ParentDish regularly and also has a novel coming out soon! :-)

Administrator said...

Alex you're very welcome and thanks for posting here. It sounds like you and your wife are raising a very well-adjusted kid there.

Alex said...

Sooverit--I am Dori's husband and yes, she would have respected her daughter's wishes. Her life revolves around those she loves, her "inner circle" and her daughter and I are at the top of that list. She's one of THE best Mom's I know and she has a great head on her shoulders. She's also raising a wonderful daughter... :-)

Thanks for posting a link to her article, Admin! She writes at ParentDish regularly and also has a novel coming out soon! :-)

Hippie Chick said...

1st off...LOVE Rocky Horror Picture Show. My friends & I get together every year & watch it. We dress up like the characters, etc. We may take it too far, but it's a classic. We always fight about who gets to dress like Magenta. The guys fight about Frakenfurter. OK...I applaud Hartley's actions. Most celebrity mom's have good heads on their shoulders & want to protect their kids. Kate will never learn. It's catching up to her. Where is she? I'll go out on a limb & say that she's done. Too much waiting between shows is not a good sign, if there is a show. She's the bad guy now anyways. Good. Just what we've been waiting for. Buh-bye.

Sooverit said...

Regarding Dori Hartley's blog post: It certainly seems like she's done the right thing by respecting her daughter's wishes that she (Dori) stays out of the public eye. However, what if the producers of Glee HAD called Dori and asked her to be on the show? Would she have declined out of respect for her daughter? I'm just saying, I would have been more impressed if Dori had actually turned down an offer. It's easy for her to say she's keeping a low profile for her daughter's sake - would she continue to do that if she got the chance to re-ignite her fame? I don't know anything about Dori. I'd never heard of her until the post about her. I just noticed she said,"I can't believe they didn't ask me to do a cameo." I'm a skeptic. Would she have been as tuned in to her daughter's dismay if the offer had actually been made? I hope so, but I'm not convinced.

Anon 1 said...

Admin, while I've never heard of this lady, kudos to her for not only *listening* to her daughter, but *hearing* what she said.

I think that article posted by Irene yesterday, at Paul Petersen's AMC, was a perfect example of what the G8 will be dealing with in the not too distant future. The story needs to be somewhat shortened, but it is excellent. It's about Jena Malone, who has starred in a no. of movies. I recognized her from Stepmom, but I've seen her in numerous other pics. It's a long read, but really excellent, she had to declare emancipation from her mom at 14, to save the monies she was earning...sadly, I think her mom loves her, but she was lousy at handling money. Would it be possible to have this article, maybe in an abbreviated version, as a thread? It's definitely a must read.

http://www.minorcon.org/malone.html

A Pink Straight Jacket For Kat said...

Good for her :o)

Now, she is a good example of responsible
parenting.

I LOVE ROCKY HORROR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My favorite scene is; Frankenfurter coming down in the elevator while stomping his hooker heel.

Frankenfurter turns around and sings: "How do you do? I see you've met my faithful handyman".

LUVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV it!

Thanks for the memories, Administrator :o)

Bodyguard my a$$ said...

That's a lovely and pertinent story, Admin. I have to say that your blog reaches new heights daily. I'm very impressed.

Oh, how I wish the G8 had a birth mother with just one shred of Dori's insight, or just plain dignity.

If Khate really was infertile, there's a darn good reason for it. Kids deserve to be cherished and have their mother's face just ooze with love for them and joy at seeing their faces. Those poor kids deserve So. Much. Better. (I know, understatement of the year)

Their lives are a travesty and a tragedy in the making. It really is like witnessing a slow-speed car crash. I hope I don't witness how all these lives play out. It's just so heartwrenching.

How can so much mental illness and personality disorder live in one person? I've sadly witnessed mental illness and personality disorders, but never such a complete package as we see in Khate. She's one scary sociopath. I hate to even imagine the pain in those kids' hearts. How they don't wet themselves when she goes off on them is a mystery to me. Like that scene (I think it was you who showed it) where they have to list the order to eat their lunches. That voice and that look on her face scared me, and I'm older than her! I can't imagine being a child experiencing that hatred daily. In what world does someone think that's not only ok, but ok to do in front of a camera and crew? I shudder to think what we don't see.

To all the nannies, housekeepers, TLC camera crews: Shame on you for not telling the truth about this woman and protecting those kids. There's no confidentiality agreement on this Earth that would keep me from exposing her abuse and protecting those children.

To Jon: You have eight little souls in your hands. Their pain is all on you. You made eight children with a sick, evil woman. I don't know what you were thinking, but now it's all on you to protect them. Their mother is going to destroy them if you don't do something drastic. It's not all about the filming. It's what they live with on a daily basis without you there as a buffer. I have male family members who have been abused like you; I've seen what it does to a man. But it's time to boss up. You are the only hope those kids have.

Thank you, Admin, for giving us a place to express our pain and anger. I know there are countless children being abused in this country, and it's all so very sad. But this is happening right in front of our faces, to children whose names we know, and it's just unbearable sometimes.

Crabitha Codswallop said...

Admin, what are your thoughts about Sylvia?

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