Monday, August 11, 2014

R.I.P. Robin Williams

Mrs. Doubtfire was more than just a funny movie. 



In addition to just being a darn good film, Mrs. Doubtfire gave us two great gifts. One was the launch of Mara Wilson, a wonderful child actor who grew up into one of the most insightful and brutally honest young women to ever speak out on the dangers of child stardom.

The second was a story about how terrible parental alienation can be. The lesson of Mrs. Doubtfire is that when there are two appropriate parents, children do best when both parents are as involved as often as possible. And appropriate should not be related to which parent has the better job, house, or handsome significant other.

No one had ever heard of parental alienation in 1993. But Mrs. Doubtfire dove head first into the concept. Miranda, the children's mother, repeatedly insults and degrades her children's father, and fought for full custody even though the children adored him. Daniel, played by Williams, is devoted to his children but is a struggling actor who can't compete with his architect ex who has much better lawyers and a nicer looking lifestyle. He ends up with visits every other weekend and a social worker from the courts assigned to the case to report to. Eventually he is able to get a job as the children's nanny by disguising himself as an old English woman named Mrs. Doubtfire.  Send the kids to their room before you verbally bash their father
, Mrs. Doubtfire so wisely advises Miranda. Even when Daniel does everything the judge asks of him, he still loses custody and has his visits restricted to monitored.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d_QbFFMibmU

Eventually, Miranda comes around and allows Daniel to be more involved in the children's lives despite the custody order. Not bad for 1993.

340 sediments (sic) from readers:

«Oldest   ‹Older   1 – 200 of 340   Newer›   Newest»
canadianmom said...

So sad to hear of the passing of Robin Williams, he was such a genius.

I have a blended family, My DH had 4 children with both of his ex wives and unfortunately all 4 kids have been PASed like crazy. Tragically his oldest son (20 at the time) committed suicide 2 years ago, in his note he said he couldn't go on anymore knowing that his father never loved him and had abandoned him when he was a child. Of course this was what his mother had hammered into his head his whole life, the truth was that his mother had been having numerous affairs and kicked him out when he came home early to find her in their bad with another man. My DH loved his son dearly and was always very active in his life, but I guess when your mother is brain washing you your whole life there wasn't much my DH could do to combat that. Parental alienation is child abuse, my poor step son paid dearly because of it.

I don't post often but I saw this thread and felt compelled.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

He suffered from bipolar disorder. We appear to be failing when it comes to mental health. So many tragic occurrences are traced back to mental illness.

We can't even seem to make it better for a multi millionaire.

This is yet another sad example of how you don't need money and stuff, it does not necessarily make your life happier or better.

One Hour Photo was another classic that I just mentioned the other day.

Nancy said...

The first thing I thought was I hope this is just a stupid rumor then when it became apparent it wasn't I thought money and fame of which he had in abundance can't always fix what's broken. Such a huge loss of a huge talent but at the end of the day he was just a person with a family and "real" people who loved him and are now suffering unbelievably and having to do it with the world.... So incredibly sad :(

chefsummer said...

I was 6 in 93' when Doubtfire came out.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Joy Behar is giving a nice interview right now on CNN. She of all people can have a lot of class when she wants to.

Jeeemy said...

I don't understand your comment that "we can't even make it better for a multiple millionare". Of course we can't. Mental illness is an illness. It is sometimes treatable and sometimes fatal. Just as physical illnesses are. The bi polar diagnosis comes with a comparatively high rate of suicide. Pancreatic cancer comes with a high rate of quick death. Money didn't save Michael Landon, how could it save Robin Williams?

Tucker's Mom said...

canadianmom said... 1
So sad to hear of the passing of Robin Williams, he was such a genius.

I have a blended family
******
Thank you for sharing.
Anyone who has been touched by suicide knows just how profound it is, how much if affects those caught in its insidious, eternal ripple effect and how it transcends any other human experience known to man.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


I don't understand your comment that "we can't even make it better for a multiple millionare". Of course we can't.

&&&&

No, we have a long way to go in terms of understanding and treating mental illness. We are in kindergarten when it comes to this area of medicine. We have only scratched the surface. Someday hopefully we can say "of course we can" make things better for everyone who suffers from mental illness. We can't give up on it even in the face of tragedies like this one.

However my comment was also commentary on how so many people seem to think that money and fame will be the ticket. When it's been proven over and over again it makes little to no difference. Yet they never get it.

Treatments for pancreatic cancer have vastly improved since 1990. We may even be close to a prescreening test for it thanks to a talented young man. I'm glad we didn't write this off in 1990 as well of course we could''t save him or anyone. So too 25 years from now I hope we can say the same for mental illness, that things are vastly improved since 2014.

Jeremy said...

Admin, I haven't seen now, nor have I ever heard, that he suffered from bipolar. If indeed you are privy to confidential information, I think it is very inappropriate for you to disclose this.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


Admin, I haven't seen now, nor have I ever heard, that he suffered from bipolar. If indeed you are privy to confidential information, I think it is very inappropriate for you to disclose this.


&&&

What the hell? Why would I do that? This has widely been reported for years. Not sure how you missed it. Everyone is talking about it. Even PBS has reported he was bipolar, as well as other reputable news organizations like The Denver Post. It didn't come from tabloids and certainly NOT from confidential info, come on. There is no reason to place such a stigma on it either.

Jeremy said...

My apologies. I was just coming back on to apologize, as I did just see this diagnosis in an article for the first time. This was the very first I have read about him suffering from bipolar, and I always thought I knew a great deal about the disorder as well as the actor. Again, I apologize. This has impacted me greatly. Feel free to delete my first post. J

Tucker's Mom said...

Robin William had a multitude of comorbidities that have been public for many years, including alcohol addiction, drug addiction, depression and bipolar disorder to name just what I'm aware of.
You can just imagine the burden this was to carry, all the while making people laugh and cry and being an inspiration to many.

foxy said...

This is truly a sad day losing Robin Williams. Many people suffer from clinical depression, but for some reason it is treated like the plague. Nobody wants to address it. Jonathon Winters was another genius who suffered from deep depression. Joan Kennedy, first wife of the late Senator, also suffers from depression. I think when she and her children opened up about the difficulties in coping with life during the black periods has done a tremendous public service to people every where. It should not be treated any other way than the illness that it is. My neighbor took her life a month ago. Very young. Her father went to the house to check on her and found her outside. She refused to take the meds that had been prescribed for her beginning when she was in her twenties. Sad indeed.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

No worries Jeremy I think this has affected a lot of people on a deep level both those who enjoyed his work and those who feel upset for whatever various reasons about the mental illness aspect of it.

CNN really had it spot on when they said that he belonged to every generation. Usually an actor belongs to a certain generation, and it's hard for younger folks to really understand it when a "great" dies. Perhaps they might not even know the person's name. He was different. He had the Mork and Mindy and Happy Days crowd long before people like Chef and I were ever born, and then for Chef and I and our generation it was Aladdin and Mrs. Doubtfire and Good Will Hunting which our movies I know I consider a part of my childhood. I think Good Will Hunting was the first movie I was allowed to see in the theater alone with some girlfriends and I remember all the talk from our parents about how WELL they heard it was a good movie but they certainly didn't approve of the F bomb being dropped 200 times BUT we trust Robin Williams and if we went with friends I guess it would be okay--lol. For kids today he did things like Night of the Museum that spoke to them. What I treasure about him is that you could sit down with one of his movies and the parents, grandparents AND kids would all love it. That is hard to find in an entertainer.

It's not too often you see a guy with such universal appeal. In fact I can't remember I've ever seen something like this. He brought people together, and that is a special thing worthy of grief and remembrance.

Localyocul said...

I hadnanfeeling he was bipolar since some of his comedy seemed manic. I am so sad I remember him from as far back as Happy Days and Mork and Mindy he had a great talent

lukebandit said...

chefsummer said...4

My youngest ds was 7 in `93!

Millicent said...

Robin Williams' death saddens me deeply. I am actually crying as I read some wonderful tributes on FB and elsewhere. He lived in Tiburon, which is about 45 minutes south of me. He was, among other things, a fan of the SF Giants and attended games when he was able. I saw him once from a distance at one of their games. I understand that he was polite and often friendly with fans.

I had been aware that he battled many demons, including depression, alcohol addiction, etc. To think that this man, who often felt such pain, turned that into comedy that made millions laugh, is amazing. I loved watching Mork & Mindy as a child; loved him as Mrs. Doubtfire; loved Good Will Hunting and Good Morning Vietnam; loved how quick his mind worked. I laughed so hard at his early stand up comedy that my face would hurt but I couldnt' stop laughing.

Robin Williams really made an impact on the world and will be remembered for quite a long time. I hope that his soul is at peace at long last. One of the posts on FB said something like "Up in heaven, they're saying "Robin's here! Let's get this party started!" I am so sad for his family, but I guess he just couldn't take it any more. Rest in peace Robin Williams.

penny said...

I am very sad.

chefsummer said...

I loved Aladdin and flubber and Jumanji and hook I think I watched all of them over a hundred times.

I wore out my mom's VHS tapes lol.

JTN said...

One of my professors in grad school committed suicide. Great guy, wonderful wife, children, and grandchildren. He was also one of the most liberal professors you would ever meet... he hated guns and was very pro-gun control. He had been ill for several years with a chronic condition. When it came back unexpectedly, it threw him into a deep depression. His wife saw it and had him placed on a psychiatric hold to get him treatment. Several of his colleagues and friends were actively involved trying to do anything they could. He waited out the hold, bought a gun, and promptly blew his brains out in his study.

This professor had everything to live for, but inside his own skin he felt hopeless.

I don't know Robin Williams aside from his work. I do know he has suffered from dependencies and mental issues over the years. He also had heart related issues. You only have to listen to his standup routines to hear the struggles and sadness. Most great comedians turn their darkest moments into comedic fodder because its either laugh or cry. Unfortunately, my guess is Robin Williams stopped being able to laugh.
I feel horrible for his family and especially his children. Death is painful and for most of us, private. On one level, its probably nice to see how many people loved him, but its also probably overwhelming when all they want to do is close the door and scream.

lukebandit said...

Every news outlet possible has a picture of Robin Williams and is announcing his passing on Facebook.

I wonder if Whoopie will be able to handle talking about it tomorrow.

A lady said on dr. drew that Robin, no matter where in the world he was, he had a satellite phone and he called his kids at home every night and talked to them before they went to bed.

CNN just said that on Mork and Mindy their tv ratings were 60 million viewers a week. Who does that now?

Call Me Crazy said...

Robin Williams was always very open and honest about his struggles with addiction and depression. He probably helped untold numbers of people by being so upfront and not treating his demons as a terrible dark secret to be hidden away.

His body of work is extraordinary. He succeeded in every aspect of the entertainment business, from stand-up comedy to television to film to theatre. He was truly a one of a kind talent.

lukebandit said...

Oh, my Gosh! I just remembered. Robin was in the Law and Order: SVU in the episode, Authority. He played a guy impersonating a police officer who ordered a fast food store manager to assault a girl employee.

I hope many people now will get help, more funding will be available for those needing help.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

I forgot about Hook! I remember now that was a date with my mom and me to go see Hook. We rarely spent the money to see movies in the theater so that was a big deal.

I appreciate he was so open about his struggles. I believe a huge step in doing better in this area is we need to remove the stigma of it. He did a great thing in that regard.

AuntieAnn said...

I'm glad to have lived in this old earth while he was here. He made it a brighter place. I'm sure he'll continue...

What dreams may come, Robin.

librarylady said...

My kids looked at each other and said "Jumanji" when they heard. Then several others. Most of his movies were older by the time they could watch them, but to this day Mrs. Doubtfire will win out over anything else on tv, even as they are young adults.

Every day at my job I see the struggles of those with mental illness. I truly hope that someday we will have a much better handle on understanding and treating, and without the side effects which cause so many problems of their own. We truly are, as the previous post says, in " kindergarten" with it all.

NJGal51 said...

My favorite is The Birdcage followed by Mrs. Doubtfire. If I'm flipping channels and either one of those movies is on I'll stop and watch.

Anne B. said...

Celebrity worship isout of control. Where's the outrage over that young teen that was shot to death a few days ago?

It's funny, we make fun of the sheeple for 'worshipping' Kate and yet we all are guilty of worshipping other celebrities. It's sad.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


It's funny, we make fun of the sheeple for 'worshipping' Kate and yet we all are guilty of worshipping other celebrities. It's sad.


&&&&

I don't think there's any comparison.

There's a difference between feeling deeply affected by a celeb's work, versus becoming obsessed with the celeb themselves. This is no different than anything meaningful in your life having a deep effect on you, including perhaps a favorite city where you met your husband, or your favorite lookout spot, or a song that reminds you of happy times that moves you to tears. The smell of corn on the cob laid on the grill reminds me of summers with my grandparents. Same with a movie. Life for many people is a deeply emotional experience. For some people, often times, actors and some of their roles are a part of some of the emotions you experienced. It's not all your experiences, but it is one part of it.

That is not the same as being obsessed with a celeb to the point where you have an unhealthy interest in them as a PERSON. Do I know if RR even has kids? Nope. Don't know a thing about his relationships either. Did I remember he lived in San Francisco? VAGUELY, but I wouldn't bet money on it. Quite frankly while I had heard about the bipolar I never heard about the heart surgeries or the drinking. That's news to me.

There is nothing wrong with appreciating someone's talent, whether that is acting, making you laugh, or any number of things. You become a sheep when you develop an unnecessary interest in that talent as a person, when you start inserting yourself into their private life and when you start to feel they can do no wrong. Apples and oranges.

Paper Plates Forever! Yay! said...

One of the best movies I think he ever made was The World According to Garp. It is a great story with some very good actors. His incredible acting skills were quite evident in this movie.

Rhymes with Witch said...

Suicide is terrible for family and friends. I have no idea who Robin's are, but my heart goes out to them. R.I.P Robin.

FlimsyFlamsy said...

Anne B. (#28), I don't think a single comment on this thread has come close to the word "worship." A famous entertainer, with an immense body of work, and a history of helping out charitable organizations,
has died. And people have come here to share their feelings.

Anonymous said...

(Leslie)
I saw the movie ages ago but I can't remember why he had his visits restricted to monitored.

kris said...

My favorite Robin Williams movie hands down. I still laugh as much now as I did the 1st time I watched it (and I've probably seen it 20 times). I was in Elem. School and a huge 'Happy Days' fan, so I remember Mork being introduced on that show and I followed him over and was a huge 'Mork & Mindy' fan. I just adored him in everything he did. He was so funny but then was so creepy in 'One Hour Photo' I just couldn't believe that was him. RIP Robin, you will be missed <3

kris said...

NJGal51 said... 27

My favorite is The Birdcage followed by Mrs. Doubtfire. If I'm flipping channels and either one of those movies is on I'll stop and watch.
*****************
OMGosh, he and Nathan Lane were just completely hysterical in that movie!

kris said...

Anne B. said... 28
It's funny, we make fun of the sheeple for 'worshipping' Kate and yet we all are guilty of worshipping other celebrities. It's sad.
*********************
The only one I worship is Jesus Christ. And admiring and respecting someone like Robin Williams who is a try talent; he could make people laugh, cry, was generous with his time to the military, kind to his fans all the while suffering from addiction and depression. Kate on the other hand has no talent, isn't generous nor kind, so yeah, no admiration or respect for her.

There is tons of tragedy going on in the world, Christians are being beheaded over in Iraq, Muslum women are being stoned in the street. Just because it's not being talked about here doesn't mean other world tragedies aren't being felt by those that post here.

JMO said...

I don't think anyone ":worshipped" him, but rather enjoyed his work. Did not know about his family, etc... until I read articles yesterday regarding this tragedy. My favorites were: The World According to Garp, Good Will Hunting; Good Morning Vietnam, and Mrs. Doubtfire.

I was flipping channels about a week ago and saw him in an interview where he was discussing going back in to rehab and the reasons why.
I was surprised by his candor, but yet sensed sadness.

Prayers go out to his family and may he rest in peace.

Tucker's Mom said...

kris said... 36
*****
Exactly what Kris said.
Robin Williams had a decades-long, prolific career based on talent and hard work.
He was generous and quite open about how he wasn't perfect. Far from our rainbows and unicorns Kate.
This is a tribute, not worship, to an amazing life, tragically, ended too soon.

What's so great about his community is that we can reach out and share to somehow sooth our grieving over Robins Williams, but also about the things that have touched our lives in a similar way.

Mel said...

A lady said on dr. drew that Robin, no matter where in the world he was, he had a satellite phone and he called his kids at home every night and talked to them before they went to bed. 
*****************
Versus TFW who was gone for weeks at a time and didn't want to hear from her kids or Jon unless it was an emergency. She "parented best from afar."

And she wonders why she is so disliked....

FlimsyFlamsy said...

I'm still a bit chapped about the comment saying we "worshipped"
a celebrity about whose passing we expressed grief. It's that
black and white mentality again. Like you can only be a "fan"
or a "hater."

I happen to think Jon Gosselin is about a thousand times better
of a parent than Kate Gosselin. Does that mean I worship him? Absolutely not. There's a huge span of feelings between love
and hate. You can admire people. You can be fond of people.
You can be annoyed by people. You can care about people,
and yet be angered by their behavior. There are all sorts of
gray areas in adult relationships.

chefsummer said...

lukebandit said... 16
chefsummer said...4

My youngest ds was 7 in `93!
______

I feel so old sometimes lol.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


There is tons of tragedy going on in the world, Christians are being beheaded over in Iraq, Muslum women are being stoned in the street. Just because it's not being talked about here doesn't mean other world tragedies aren't being felt by those that post here.


&&&

We've really moved away from mentioning too many political events here. It's pretty rare that we do. I think it's been better that way. It can really derail things fast. But one should not mistake "compartmentalizing" what you care about as not caring. RR's death is a generally "safe" subject to talk about with a large group of people, not really political, unlike many other tragic things going on in the world.

chefsummer said...

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said... 29

It's funny, we make fun of the sheeple for 'worshipping' Kate and yet we all are guilty of worshipping other celebrities. It's sad.


&&&&

I don't think there's any comparison.

There's a difference between feeling deeply affected by a celeb's work, versus becoming obsessed with the celeb themselves.
_________

I agree Milo seems obsessed with Kate and all things Kate.

For me their are two things that make me feel connected with a famous person.

1. I have been watching them since childhood.
2. They're positive people who do good things I.E-(help people love their fans are just good folks in general)

I think us fans our favorite entertainers have immortality and when they pass on or have real life problems were like "WTH really-(or I do this)

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

I can't believe how many comments are about RW on FB this morning. From my friends my parents' age to my friends to even some of the younger crowd.

The comments are all pretty much the same. This particular comedic work made me laugh and laugh. Or this particular dramatic work made me cry and cry.

The thing is, humans want to feel emotion. Robin Williams tapped into that with his incredible dramatic brilliance. He made us feel powerful belly laughs. He made us feel wet tears in films like Good Will Hunting. Not many other talents could do that on that level.

That's not worship. That's the human condition. And he knew it, he found it, and he exploited it in a wonderful way. RIP.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

1. I have been watching them since childhood.

&&&

I think that's another thing about this is that for a huge group of us millennials we were introduced to him in our childhoods, and we've reserved a special place in our memory banks for the laughs he gave us. Whether your childhood was good or bad, we all had a good time laughing at Aladin, Mrs. Doubtfire, Hook. We all had a good cry at Patch Adams and Good Will Hunting.. For some of us, a Robin Williams movie was one of the first movies we remember. As I said my "first" movie alone with girlfriends was GWH.

It's confusing when a piece of your childhood that was that happy or special dies. It makes you feel like it's harder to sort of get those good feelings back.

FlimsyFlamsy said...

I keep reading comments and saying, "Oh, man, I forgot about THAT
movie." A career that spanned almost 40 years. Pretty impressive.

Any more news from Boston? Will she stick one of the kids on
a horse, and make him re-enact the midnight ride of Paul Revere?
Who can forget TFW making the poor kids traipse up and down the steps in Philadelphia to copy the scene in Rocky (every little child's favorite movie)? Yup, they were just "playing" -- wandering in and
out of frame -- but their piecin-and-patchin mom was working.

chefsummer said...

There is tons of tragedy going on in the world, Christians are being beheaded over in Iraq, Muslum women are being stoned in the street. Just because it's not being talked about here doesn't mean other world tragedies aren't being felt by those that post here.
____

I haven't heard this but it's sad.

However I think we feel/mourn what's close to us at the moment like Robin Williams passing.

I mourn for the innocent children and people that are being killed in Chicago-(where I live)- because of the gang violence.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


Any more news from Boston? Will she stick one of the kids on
a horse, and make him re-enact the midnight ride of Paul Revere?


&&&

It's a rather odd vacation choice for somebody like her unless somebody else is paying for it.

She doesn't exactly lean heavily on the educational side of vacations and so much of that city is all about that. She wants to put her feet up at the beach and think about nothing.

Kirkland said...

The movie "RV" hasn't been mentioned yet, but for me, it's one of my favorite Robin Williams movie. I thought it was absolutely hilarious and he was so funny in that movie. And there was some very tender family moments in that show. I loved how he could make me laugh one minute, then tear up in the next. He was truly talented.

FlimsyFlamsy said...

Chef (#47), I appreciate your saying that you mourn for the innocent people being killed by gang violence in Chicago. Like love, grief or compassion isn't finite. You can feel sad about your hometown's
troubles, and still feel sad about Robin Williams, and also feel sad about any number of other things.

I suspect that "worship" comment was meant as a diversion, and
I guess it worked, because I keep commenting about it!

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Diversion

&&&&


The sheeple are obsessed with trying to find any little hypocrisy that they can and then crying, see, hypocrisy hypocrisy! It's a fun game I guess. They will twist themselves into a pretzel to find the hypocrisy. Even though the entire country is mourning the loss of a brilliant talent whose work had meaning to the generations, they have found a way to somehow try to say that is the same as us complaining about the sheeple's freaking CREEPY worship of a no-talent nothing named Kate.

When you have no other way to defend your hero, you have to somehow find a way to discredit the other side. This is what they've fixated on and they've done it for years, most of the time in unpublished comments here. That's what's sad.

chefsummer said...

FlimsyFlamsy said... 50

Of course it just saddens me to hear that a child was killed or anyone for that matter due to something I fine unnecessary.

I remember before getting my two dogs saying why would someone cry or be sad over losing a pet I never understood why.

But now I do the understand the bonding you have with an animal.

We have have a bond our favorite entertainers-(even though we don't know them) we love them.

Formerly Duped said...

I was profoundly affected by the news about Robin Williams. Then I thought, did I have a right to be? Isn't grief reserved for his family and friends? I was just watching Dead Poets Society the night before this shocking sad news broke. I think yes, RW put so much of himself out there for the public good that I believe we should grieve. Paraphrasing what his wife said, I think we should remember his life, not how he died. But we must keep in mind , what mental illness and drug and alcohol abuse can do to a life and watch out for our loved ones.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


I was profoundly affected by the news about Robin Williams. Then I thought, did I have a right to be? Isn't grief reserved for his family and friends? I


&&&


Most of us didn't know him personally so we're not really grieving him as a person exactly.

I think what we're grieving is what he did for us. Whether it's making us laugh when we were sad, bringing us together with various generations to enjoy a film together, or making us feel any other deep emotion.

What we're really mourning is a guy who helped us access a wealth of emotions so freely, and helped us do that with those we cared about around us. That's special.

If someone touched you in that way, it is right and appropriate to grieve their passing and not feel there is anything wrong with that. But it really is grief over what he did not exactly who he was. I don't know who he really was, I never met or spent time with him.

chefsummer said...

I think what we're grieving is what he did for us.
____

Bingo.

Tweet-le De Tweet-le DUMB said...

I think what we're grieving is what he did for us. Whether it's making us laugh when we were sad, bringing us together with various generations to enjoy a film together, or making us feel any other deep emotion.

What we're really mourning is a guy who helped us access a wealth of emotions so freely, and helped us do that with those we cared about around us. That's special.
___________

I'm grieving over his life and the tortures he suffered and how he couldn't take it anymore. I didn't think about him on a daily basis like, let's say, my daughter who suffers with BPD and bipolar disorder. But his death has reminded me of how he, too, suffered, daily.

sparkle said...

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said... 51
Diversion

&&&&

..."When you have no other way to defend your hero, you have to somehow find a way to discredit the other side. This is what they've fixated on and they've done it for years, most of the time in unpublished comments here. That's what's sad."
&&&&&&&&&&&

It is sad, especially when you consider that they are hypocrites personified. Somehow, they've gone from insisting Kate is a perfect mother and human who has no faults, to now admitting all Kate's ugliness and making excuses for her.

At any rate, it almost seems like a crime and an insult to even mention Kate and Robin Williams in the same breath. The outpouring of sadness over his loss is palpable. I wish he somehow could have felt the love so many had for him before he made the ultimate decision.

Layla said...

I had the pleasure of meeting Robin Williams in the mid-80s. He was peforming at the civic center in my hometown, but I didn't have tickets. I was walking with some of my friends in the downtown area of Cedar Rapids (near the civic center where he was performing) and we approached the Paramount Theatre, an old, historic theatre with a beautiful old pipe organ. A man was standing in front of the theatre, and as we approached, we realized it was Robin WIlliams. Out on his own, on foot, with no bodyguards or entourage. He asked us some questions about the theatre and was particularly interested in the pipe organ. He had obviously done some research, and really wanted to see both the inside of the theatre and the organ. We discussed performances we had seen there, and told him the hours he could come back for a tour. Then he thanked us and we left.

I was impressed with how normal he seemed, and also with the fact that he had bothered to find something unique and interesting in our town that he wanted to see. I always imagined that performers coming to Cedar Rapids, IA would just want to get it over with and go. But he didn't. He was curious and interested in what our town had to offer.

RIP, Mr. Williams.

AuntieAnn said...

Mel said... 39

*****************
Versus TFW who was gone for weeks at a time and didn't want to hear from her kids or Jon unless it was an emergency. She "parented best from afar."

And she wonders why she is so disliked....

====


I agree and as admin stated, there's really no comparison.
I just read this about him:

"It was so sudden and he was such a great guy and it's such a loss to the whole community," said Daniel Jennings who lived across the street from Williams in the quiet neighbourhood where the actor was often seen riding his bike and stopping to talk to neighbours. One thing he never did, residents said, was act like a celebrity.
"He was really nice to all the neighbours," Daniels said. "Really appreciated his kindness."

White Organza said...

My favorite Robin Williams' movie ever is Fisher King, with Jeff Bridges. I don't know exactly why... Maybe because Williams succeeds so well in making the spectator believe in the acute pain of mental illness suffered by the character he plays.

A great artist, a truly tremendous actor. Something we sometimes overlooked because he also was such a terrific comic.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

His death means something different for those with a personal connection to mental illness. It's not a whole lot different though than anyone with mental illness whose life ends so tragically. Sadly, this happens every day but most people don't go around mourning strangers every day. This is about more than that. It's about a face in the crowd, someone representative of the issue whom people felt a connection to. While he was a stranger in the sense that most of us didn't know him on a personal level, he was not a stranger when it came to being our guide down some very fun and complex emotions. Then that same "stranger" who really wasn't crosses paths with something like mental illness and it's tragic and deeply upsetting and feels somewhat personal.

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

Kris, 26, and admin, 54 ("But it really is grief over what he did not exactly who he was. I don't know who he really was, I never met or spent time with him.")...

**********
I met him twice and spent a very short amount of time with him. I didn't know him. This was many years ago. I didn't worship him, I really wasn't a fan, but I remember him as being gracious, funny, and above everything else, kind. Very kind, making one feel comfortable and important. It wasn't all about him, but rather about the person with whom he was engaged in conversation. He made that one person feel special.

I've never heard that said about Kate, and don't expect that we ever will.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

It is sad, especially when you consider that they are hypocrites personified. Somehow, they've gone from insisting Kate is a perfect mother and human who has no faults, to now admitting all Kate's ugliness and making excuses for her.


&&&&

Oh my gosh totally. They really have moved away from perfect Kate. Like you said now it's Kate's ugly but it's okay because she's a mom blah blah. But they've taken it a step further and are now saying Kate's ugly BUT you "haters" are uglier!

It's just so dumb. I firmly believe the sheeple who are left enjoy the battle with all the people who don't like Kate more than they even like Kate herself. It's like all they have, it's become their identity.

Girl From Up North said...

Anne B. said... 28

Anne I am outraged by that shooting, just as the Travon Martin case. No doubt there are countless others. I will never comprehend what that family is going through, or their community.

We, here, are just talking about the topic at hand today.

AuntieAnn said...

White Organza said... 60

A great artist, a truly tremendous actor. Something we sometimes overlooked because he also was such a terrific comic.

====

If you ever get a chance, please watch What Dreams May Come. It is my favorite RW movie. It never seems to be mentioned when people talk about his dramatic performances. He's excellent in it. This past winter I dusted it off and watched it again, along with some other older movies. Today it's uncannily germane.

JMO said...

You know what? We are good people who mourn the death of someone who had talent and tragidly left this earth.

TFW does not fit that bill, so she should not be part of any conversation regarding Robin Williams. Day and night - no connection.

I am A-Okay that I feel empathy for someone who had true talent, but had MH issues and tried to address them. This has nothing to do with TFW. What the hell? How many issues do we discuss that have nothing to do with TFW. Everything is not about TFW. At least we know it.

Tucker's Mom said...

Kirkland said... 49
The movie "RV" hasn't been mentioned yet, but for me, it's one of my favorite Robin Williams movie. I thought it was absolutely hilarious and he was so funny in that movie. And there was some very tender family moments in that show. I loved how he could make me laugh one minute, then tear up in the next. He was truly talented.
*******
I was going to mention this one!
I love RV- it's got everything from belly laughs to scatological humor (yes, I'm silly for that stuff), to a heartfelt, touching message about family and what's important in life.
It makes me weepy to think of RV, actually. It was one of the last movies DH and I took my mom to.
She loved it, and that old broad was not easy to amuse!

Blowing In The Wind said...

So Kate is missing in action. Milo is missing in action. Gladys has a history of disappearing along with Kate.

Why is it that Milo can only worship/defend Kate when Kate is on twitter? She can't do it when Kate is gone?

If Milo reads here, just wait...one, two three -- she will show up today.

Blowing In The Wind said...

This has nothing to do with TFW. What the hell? How many issues do we discuss that have nothing to do with TFW. Everything is not about TFW. At least we know it.

---------------------

Yes, and I have to laugh at the sheeple who claim that we, here on this blog, are obsessed with talking about Kate "all the time" even though we say that she is done, is boring, and whatever. Sheep - look at the topics of the various threads!

Funny thing is, though, that this is all they talk about, and couldn't hold an intelligent conversation about any other topic if their lives depended on it. Now they have moved on from Kate being the perfect mother to hey, she does what she has to do. It's really pathetic when you think about it. They'll never give up this Hatfields-McCoys feud. It's become their reason for existence, and that just boggles the mind.

Paula said...

Truly only the sheeple, or Kate herself, would bring a discussion about Robin Williams' death around to Kate. Sheesh.....

Call Me Crazy said...

Layla, what a lovely story. It really is the little encounters we have with people that can end up being the most memorable.

Auntie, I always remember the amazing cinematography in What Dreams May Come. In addition to so many of Robin Williams' wonderful films others have mentioned, I also enjoyed Awakenings very much.

I feel terribly sad for his family and friends, and for him - that he suffered so while providing immeasurable joy and emotion to the world.

JMO said...

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said... 48
---------------------------

I agree- Has grifting built all over it. Some poor sole probably offered their house for a bit at no cost.

I do have to say Boston is awesome and has so much to see and do. Hopefully the kids will get to see some things of interest, but not feeling confident with TFW at the helm. Just takes a few minutes to look up interests for children. Well- she does have 8 children as she posts non-stop.

Sheri said...

RIP Robin Williams.

Another great film of his that rarely gets mentioned is Jakob the Liar. It is an excellent film that is poignant and touching. I highly recommend it.

And What Dreams May Come is one of my favourite RW movies as well.

handinhand said...

One of my favorite pieces of acting is when Robin Williams as Armand Goldman nearly nods off while Gene Hackman as Senator Kevin Keeley describes his trip down to South Beach in all its boring, state by state detail in The Bird Cage. Even though I know it's coming, it still makes me laugh every time.

Millicent said...

I have been reading so many comments about RW on-line, with people sharing their grief and in some cases, their personal memories. It is amazing how many lives he touched, in a positive way. Thank you Auntie Anne and others for recommending What Dreams May Come. That is one RW film I have not yet seen but I'm adding it to my Netflix. I saw The World According to Garp many many years ago - I think I need to re-watch that as well.

I will take his family's wishes to heart and when I think of Robin Williams, I will smile in memory of all the good he did in his nearly 6 1/2 decades on this earth. Such an extremely brilliant and talented man.

Anonymous said...

Not only was Robin Williams a man of great talent he was a loyal generous friend to his old roomate Christopher Reeve. I've read that at the time of Christopher Reeve's accident and subsequent treatment for his spinal injury, Robin Williams paid for expenses not covered by health insurance.

bm

Anonymous said...

(Leslie)
What was the name of the film that RW was in where he was a Dr. in a hospital where people were comatose. He gave them a drug and they "all came to life with personalities" for awhile. It was a great movie. I saw it on TV a few years ago.

NJGal51 said...

Leslie - That movie was Awakenings.

Sheri said...

Anonymous said... 77

(Leslie)
What was the name of the film that RW was in where he was a Dr. in a hospital where people were comatose. He gave them a drug and they "all came to life with personalities" for awhile. It was a great movie. I saw it on TV a few years ago.

*******************

You're talking about Awakenings...another great film.

I just thought of another RW film that I really enjoyed, Bicentennial Man. He plays an android that stays with the same family through several generations.

Wow, so many great movies that I had forgotten about. Robin Williams had a very prolific career and though I know he is best known for his comedy he was also quite the accomplished dramatic actor.


Call Me Crazy said...

(Leslie)
What was the name of the film that RW was in where he was a Dr. in a hospital where people were comatose. He gave them a drug and they "all came to life with personalities" for awhile. It was a great movie. I saw it on TV a few years ago.
________________

Leslie, that was Awakenings. His character was based loosely on Dr. Oliver Sacks. I agree that it was a great movie.

Another great one was Moscow on the Hudson.

AuntieAnn said...

Thank you Auntie Anne and others for recommending What Dreams May Come. That is one RW film I have not yet seen but I'm adding it to my Netflix.

====

You're welcome Millicent.

As is customary when an actor dies, as a memorial, TCM will also probably have a full day of airing Robin's movies in the near future. They really are classy when it comes to respecting great artists. Whether it's on Netflix or TCM, I do hope you get to watch it. It's a very moving film.

Math Girl said...

Anonymous said... 77
(Leslie)
What was the name of the film that RW was in where he was a Dr. in a hospital where people were comatose.
-----------------------------------
It was Awakenings.

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

Danielle ‏@trefry26 33m
Just saw @Kateplusmy8 in Danvers.... Whaaat?

Danvers, which once was Salem Village, and Salem was known as Salem Town. Perhaps they are doing the historic (1692) thing. I hope so. It's one of my favorite places of all time!

And I refuse to make a snide remark about Kate and witches. ;)

NJGal51 said...

@trefry26: Just saw @Kateplusmy8 in Danvers.... Whaaat?
========
Maybe the kids are having her committed to Danvers State Hospital or they thought it was one of the sites of the Salem bitch hunts so thought she'd feel at home. I'm guessing grifted vacation because no one has mentioned filming.

Bitchy Pants said...

Leslie 77 -- "Awakened"

I wasn't a fan of Robin Williams' comedy. I found it a bit too frenetic for my taste. It wore me out to watch him. I loved him in the more dramatic movies he made, though. "What Dreams May Come", "Dead Poets Society" and "Good Will Hunting" are among my favorite movies. I also admire and respect all the charity work he did, particularly for military personnel and their families. He was a good man. RIP Robin. You will be missed.

So TFMJG is, supposedly, in Boston with the kids. Let's hope she remembers that deep sea fishing disaster and gives the kids some dramamine if she decides to take them on a whale watch. Somehow, though, I can't see her enjoying a trip to Boston, unless it's to go shopping. It's too educationalish.

Bitchy Pants said...

Oooops. I see everyone else has corrected my error before it even got published. It's "Awakenings" not "awakened'.

localyocul said...

Wasn't there a teacher killed by a student last year in Danvers?

AuntieAnn said...

"TCM will also probably have a full day of airing Robin's movies"

also probably? WTH. I'd better go back to school too. Sorry about the poor wording.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said... 83


And I refuse to make a snide remark about Kate and witches. ;)

====

lol! Hard to resist isn't it?

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

Maybe the kids are having her committed to Danvers State Hospital or they thought it was one of the sites of the Salem bitch hunts so thought she'd feel at home.

********

Well, since that hospital's been demolished, it's going to be rather tough getting her admitted, but the cemetery still remains!

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Color me surprised Kate would take these kids to a place as cool as Danvers for vacation. They have to be filming something right?? Or maybe there is hope.

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

Robin Williams was found by his personal assistant...belt around his neck and superficial cuts on his wrist and a knife nearby.

How very sad.

NJGal51 said...

One has to wonder if this is a plant by TFW's team so that 1D will see the error of their ways and give her full VIP treatment at a future concert. Celebrity indeed.

@1DThisSecond: Kate Gosselin News 2014: Celebrity Mom Failed To Get VIP Treatment At One Direction Concert ... http://dlvr.it/6bR9SG

Anonymous said...

Kate and kids on a non-grifted vacay??
no pics=no proof.
LOL

seriously though, are all 8 in tow or just a few? who's minding the animals back at the fort?
how many helper girls are there?
how about ol' rat claws?

Is there mass chaos/confusion/mayhem??
papparazi??

lol
jcb

FlimsyFlamsy said...

Admin, it's hard to have hope when you're dealing with a woman
who told her children FDR was on Mount Rushmore, and called
the Grand Canyon "a waste of space."

White Organza said...

"You know what? We are good people who mourn the death of someone who had talent and tragidly left this earth." JMO (66)

... Someone who through his talent, through his artistry, touched us some time or other in our lives, making us laugh, making us cry, making us think... It's this connection in emotion that people who never knew him are grieving for. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Nothing. It's called being human. "No man is an island..."

------
"If you ever get a chance, please watch What Dreams May Come. It is my favorite RW movie." Auntie Ann (65)

Thanks for the recommendation, Auntie. I will surely check it out and come back to you. :)

Gee... We are all really obsessed by TFW, aren't we? Totally consumed by our hate for her. Can't think or talk about anything else.

Jeanne said...

I am actually having a problem with hypocrisy with Robin William's death. I am saddened by his death. I suffer from severe depression as well. I have spent my adult life listening to people say depression is made up for sympathy or if you think happy thoughts you'll be fine. Now I have all these people posting on Facebook that you should get help and mental illness is so hard. I'm glad that for at least today these people are aware of mental illness but I am afraid that next week we will be back to the status quo.

As Formerly Duped said, I was also watching Dead Poet's Society the night before. One cable channel was running it. That movie also includes suicide. I have always found that an incredible movie. I think he did some incredible work. I am sad his personal sorrows were so strong.

Tucker's Mom said...

RW's death has me a bit emotional today (and I'm watching beautiful tributes on the tv) , and I'm soothing my soul on this incredibly rainy day (odd this summer, actually) by cooking and baking with 2/3 of my dogs in my kitchen with me.
To add to the salve that is healing me today, there are lots of humming birds coming to the sweet syrup feeder, and I'm finally getting lemony-yellow goldfinches pecking at my thistle feeder (both attached to my kitchen window).

Call Me Crazy said...

Jeanne - I am so sorry for your suffering. Hopefully this sad turn of events for Robin Williams will open up the eyes of many people who previously dismissed mental illness. As the terrible details continue to emerge about Mr. Williams' last moments, I can only hope that people will understand and remember that his was a desperate act carried out as the result of a terrible illness.

NJGal51 said...

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said... 89
Maybe the kids are having her committed to Danvers State Hospital or they thought it was one of the sites of the Salem bitch hunts so thought she'd feel at home.
*******
Well, since that hospital's been demolished, it's going to be rather tough getting her admitted, but the cemetery still remains!
========
Well I was only joking but color me corrected.

Tucker's Mom said...

Jeanne said... 96
I am actually having a problem with hypocrisy with Robin William's death. I am saddened by his death. I suffer from severe depression as well. I have spent my adult life listening to people say depression is made up for sympathy or if you think happy thoughts you'll be fine. Now I have all these people posting on Facebook that you should get help and mental illness is so hard. I'm glad that for at least today these people are aware of mental illness but I am afraid that next week we will be back to the status quo.

********
I hear you, and had similar thoughts today.
Suddenly, everyone is an advocate.
Yes, yes, of course awareness is crucial, but the vast majority of these people on tv on just beating the proverbial drum.
I'm not being negative about advancing medical help for depression and other disorders, but suddenly, everyone is an expert and grabbing on to the cause du jour.
So Hollywood.
Blech!

I'm trying to listen in between the lines for the real stories from Robin's real life, and there are MANY.

I hope the movement to help depression takes shape and gains traction, but I wanted to say that no, you're not a "Negative Nelly" for calling most of these people out.

Glad you piped up and said it.

We are all here passionate folks, and the sharing, including mine, has been very helpful.

Thanks all!

Aunt Connie said...

In 2014 there are still people who do not believe depression is an illness as real as liver or kidney disease. To many, it is just a "bad attitude" or a "bitter old woman." Or about a child, he is just "plain stupid, backward or too shy..."


The brain is an organ, as the heart, liver, kidneys, even the skin, are organs. Organs can be disordered or diseased. Telling some one to "snap out of it" or "get a life" is often how depressed people are treated. No one would ever tell a diabetic to "snap out of it."

So much ignorance about the brain can become the loss of a loved one, and often is. My father, my grandfather and my father in law all committed suicide.

AuntieAnn said...

Tucker's Mom said... 97

RW's death has me a bit emotional today (and I'm watching beautiful tributes on the tv) , and I'm soothing my soul on this incredibly rainy day (odd this summer, actually) by cooking and baking with 2/3 of my dogs in my kitchen with me.

====

I took to my kitchen too and cooked up a mess of stuffed peppers. I hadn't associated it with his death, but now that you mention it I was dwelling on thoughts of him while I was busy. I just realized I was making a favorite "comfort" food of ours but never made the connection until now.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Jeanne I'm so sorry someone would still think that way. My sense is people are much more accepting of the science behind it these days. But just aren't sure what is the next step to help. What a shame that is still happening.

I think people are only being hypocritical if they feign intelligence about mental illness for RW but not for others. Of that I don't know if that's happened. I haven't seen it. RW's death has not changed my outlook on it nor do I think differently of his struggles than anyone else in the same boat.

Formerly Duped said...

Jeanne, wasn't the suicide scene in DPS so poignant ? I don't have depression but someone close to me does...she says she hates when people say "Oh, I am so depressed, I have a pimple" or use depression as a catch-all phrase for any minor sadness. I know how much more it is through her, and how medical intervention is somewhat limited.I know the suffering she has been through and that she has not experienced some of the greatest pleasures of life. I know this because she is my daughter.

I hope you find peace and happiness yourself. You aren't alone, and you made a very good point.

Jeremy said...

I hope you will all consider banning ROL from your internet viewing. While overall their coverage of Robin William's death has been exploitive, they sunk to a new low by publishing a pic taken during an AA meeting. They identified the town and approximate time the pic was taken. While they blurred the faces of those sitting around RW, they could be identified by their community by body type, hair etc. And since this pic is not credited, I have to assume ROL bought it from someone inside the meeting. No celebrity, no person, should ever be discouraged from seeking help because of a fear of being outed on a blog. Yes RW was open about his struggle. Maybe the brunette next to him wasn't. ROL buying a pic taken at an AA meeting set so horrific a new low, I hope we all show them our disgust by refusing to give them views.

Dwindle said...

Depression.

My best friend committed suicide. To this day I dont know how and I dont want to know. I know she checked into a hotel room to do it and had left 2 notes; one in the hotel and another at home with instructions for the care of her dog, who she boarded when she went to the hotel. When her employer called to tell me, I said that if it was anything other than a peaceful OD of medication, I didnt want to hear it and employer changed the subject. I was the last one to talk to her and I have been over the conversation a million times in my mind. I HEARD her attitude change and I swear to you THAT was when she decided, right there in our phone conversation. Stupid me - I thought she was feeling better. Great Social Worker here, eh?

I have another friend, a very experienced RN who doesnt comprehend depression in the least. "Well, *I* lost my husband with 2 little kids at home, if I can cope why cant everyone else?" "The patient is getting 50mgs of Zoloft, what else do you want?"

The problem with depression can be that we start feeling better on medication, so we think we are cured because of the lack of understanding, so we stop taking our medication. You cant stop your insulin, because you had several great days. People use the word 'depressed' all willynilly. After eating a jelly donut would ya walk around saying "Oh I am so diabetic today"? No, no one would and that is how society uses the word the depression and that is about as much limited comprehension as a lot of folks have of it too.

In the meantime, they will have to pry my Paxil out of my cold dead hands. (Dont get excited, Kasi, I am not going anywhere soon!)

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

They say just before suicide the person often seems and sounds much better. That could be because they made the decision and feel a sense of relief. I'm so sorry dwindle. That same thing happened to a friend of mine and her friend. She spoke to him just prior and she thought he seemed so much better. A day or so later she got the awful news.

The Empress is a Clown said...

I'm remembering Maria Osmond's 2012 interview on Oprah, where she talked openly about her son's long-time battles with drug abuse & depression, and his recent suicide. In this beautiful (and deeply poignant) clip, Maria sings Pia Jesus as a tribute to her son.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y5bfgrWaCfc

Dmasy said...

Dwindle, I am sorry that you lost your best friend in such a tragic way.

Anyone who has ever loved someone experiencing depression knows how helpless you feel in the face of such an overwhelming illness.

Aunt Connie, your family has suffered so many losses. I hope you are able to help each other through the pain.

This is a compassionate place to share our grief and thoughts.


Berks Neighbor said...

Just tossing in my 2cents. One of my favorite (among all the traditional Robin Williams favorites) was Bicentennial Man.

LaLaLandNoMore said...

I, too, feel so sad about Robin Williams passing. Such a talented man.

About the possible Boston vacay for TFW, who else do you know about that goes on a vacation while saying , "I am piecing and patching" just to get along financially in this world? She certainly brings out the negative.

RIP Robin Williams.

Dmasy said...

http://www.businessinsider.com/allie-brosh-of-hyperbole-on-depression-2014-8?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+businessinsider+(Business+Insider)

This is a link to one of the best descriptions of depression that I have ever read. Her words help me to understand.

Rhymes with Witch said...

I hope you will all consider banning ROL from your internet viewing. While overall their coverage of Robin William's death has been exploitive, they sunk to a new low by publishing a pic taken during an AA meeting. They identified the town and approximate time the pic was taken. 105

I can't think.of a word to adequately describe such a despicable thing

Formerly Duped said...

Dmasy said... 112
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wow, that's so eerily similar to how my daughter describes her depression, Dmasy.It's so hard to understand the feeling from 'outside,' even as a parent.Thanks for posting this.

foxy said...

There have been some celebs who have tried to bring awareness of this illness to the forefront of health issues. Patty Duke, Carrie Fisher, Jane Pauley, Sinead O'Connor just to mention a few. This illness can be as debilitating as any physical illness. Maybe now more people will bring this out in the open, not only those who suffer from this but also the care givers.

Lalalalala said...

I'm trying to fight back tears reading everyone's stories about depression and the lack of understand the general population has about it. My heart goes out to you all. I sit here wondering if my son is suffering from depression. He was on medication for it years ago but stopped. He thought the doctor gave him medication 'just because'. He decided, two weeks before this past Thanksgiving, that he didn't want to see his father and I or speak to us ever again all because I got peeved at him for wanting to skip our family Thanksgiving dinner for some lady he had just met on the internet. This lady thought it was weird that he would do that so of course they never met up for the holiday. We haven't seen him since. Now I'm worried. He's very close with his cousin's so I know that they run together and do many marathons and his job is going very well but I still wonder.

Bless everyone of you hear who is suffering with this, has a family member who is suffering or has had a loved one or close friend that has passed because of depression.

I've just been so melancholy today. I know it's because of Robin Williams death.

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

Layla @58...

Thanks for sharing your story. That was so nice. That's exactly the way I remember him. Moreover, there was no bodyguard, no Purse Girl, no hint that he was the celebrity that he was. He was a very humble person.

I was thinking about him a lot today. I remember one friend of mine who was a celebrity and has since passed away. Robin Williams reminded me so much of him. This friend was a person who would walk into a room, and rather than say, "Here I am, look at me," he'd spot someone whom he would recognize, or even a total stranger and say, " Its nice to meet you. What's your story, and thank you for coming."

I think this is what sets these people apart from Kate. Neither she, nor her six sheeple or teens who pop on twitter gushing about her (and then disappear, never to be heard from again), can realize that one of the reasons that Kate is so disliked is her attitude and her aura of superiority. The fans, I think, live vicariously through her and it doesn't matter that she's only a celebrity wannabe with no talent and no personality, no graciousness nor kindness and no concern for others. It's all about her, and that's why myriads of negative stories are popping up everywhere. She lacks that factor that would make anyone (except for Mrs. Gladys) gravitate toward her. It's a shame, really. She could have had it all, but when you burn so many bridges, there's nothing left, and that's what people remember. What kind of a legacy is that?

Lalalalala said...

Kate Gosselin really is just a little, insignificant gnat in the whole scheme of things. I think when someone who had such talent and brilliance passes, it really brings things into focus.

getofftwitter said...

Let's hope this is a real vacation, and not a filming for another special. I agree if this is not a filming, then it is probably a grifted vacation. I can not see kate ever taking her kids to a off the path vacation, to go to see a state hospital or a historic place, like the Salem witch stuff. Kate is more of the beach type, than anything history. So this is probably grifted=free.

chefsummer said...

I know depression is very real.

I had my own fight with it my first three years in HS even though I played sports and did the police explores I didn't want to do anything.

I didn't tell anyone about it.

During my third year in HS I became close with my culinary teachers who got me into cooking which really helped, My esteem I flourished in college got a good job.

Since then I'm more opening in talking about my feelings and listening to other people's feelings which also help me.

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

I took to my kitchen too and cooked up a mess of stuffed peppers. I hadn't associated it with his death, but now that you mention it I was dwelling on thoughts of him while I was busy. I just realized I was making a favorite "comfort" food of ours but never made the connection until now.

*************

Gosh. Auntie Ann...I hadn't thought about it either, but I cooked up a big batch of mac and cheese tonight. I don't know why, but I had this craving for it today (homemade, of course, as Kate would say, but it was not organic).

chefsummer said...

A guard that worked at my HS took her own life.

Formerly Duped said...

Lalalalala said... 116
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It is kind of you to wish everyone well when your son may be suffering from depression. It did seem off to cut you off like that. Maybe the cousins can help fill in the missing pieces? I do hope so.I wish your son the best and that he will reestablish communication. My, we all have our troubles, don't we?

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

"If you ever get a chance, please watch What Dreams May Come. It is my favorite RW movie." Auntie Ann (65)

Thanks for the recommendation, Auntie. I will surely check it out and come back to you. :)

**********

Yes, thank you for recommending it. I have never seen it, but I'll keep a watch out for it, hoping that the networks decide to run some of his movies. My kids always liked Hook, and of course, Mrs. Doubtfire, their absolute favorite movie of all time.

Ex Nurse said...

Jeremy said...
Yes RW was open about his struggle. Maybe the brunette next to him wasn't. ROL buying a pic taken at an AA meeting set so horrific a new low, I hope we all show them our disgust by refusing to give them views.
___________
This is a huge betrayal of the entire group. The principle of anonymity is integral to AA, and breaching it is considered one of the obstacles to recovery. I wouldn't expect ROL to have principles about this. Obviously, this came from a very sick individual from within the group, who saw the opportunity to profit from this tragedy.

My father-in-law committed suicide--it is a terrible legacy to leave for your children. Robin's death has personally affected me, because I fear that my own children may suffer this kind of loss in the future. While I have done everything I can to encourage my husband (divorce in process) to get help for his depression, I realize that there is little I can do, especially as there is a great deal of denial. It is particularly shocking, because RW was so aware of his own mental illness. The pain and isolation must have been unimaginable for him to take his life.

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

localyocul said... 87
Wasn't there a teacher killed by a student last year in Danvers?

*********

Yes, local. Good memory! It was a female teacher at Danvers High, last fall, I believe...

Call Me Crazy said...

Dwindle said ... 106

My best friend committed suicide . . . I was the last one to talk to her and I have been over the conversation a million times in my mind. I HEARD her attitude change and I swear to you THAT was when she decided, right there in our phone conversation. Stupid me - I thought she was feeling better. Great Social Worker here, eh?
_____________________________

Dwindle - I am so sorry for your loss and terrible pain. Please know you are not "stupid" in the least. There was no way for you to predict what your friend was going to do. Hindsight is always 20/20 and an impossible metric to measure our lives with. I hope you can find peace.

Lalalalala said...

Formerly Duped said... 123

Thank you for your kind comment. It's been a tough year.

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

I have always thought that the ending of Mrs. Doubtfire, so succinct, yet so spot on, was one of the things that brought so much meaning to that film. RW is responding to a letter that a little girl, Katie, wrote because she was afraid she was losing her family when her parents separated:

"Oh, my dear Katie. You know, some parents, when they're angry, they get along much better when they don't live together. They don't fight all the time, and they can become better people, and much better mummies and daddies for you. And sometimes they get back together. And sometimes they don't, dear. And if they don't, don't blame yourself. Just because they don't love each other anymore, doesn't mean that they don't love you. There are all sorts of different families, Katie. Some families have one mommy, some families have one daddy, or two families. And some children live with their uncle or aunt. Some live with their grandparents, and some children live with foster parents. And some live in separate homes, in separate neighborhoods, in different areas of the country - and they may not see each other for days, or weeks, months... even years at a time. But if there's love, dear... those are the ties that bind, and you'll have a family in your heart, forever. All my love to you, poppet, you're going to be all right... bye-bye."

So much wisdom there, so much honesty, and so spot on...

Rhymes with Witch said...

Maybe the kids are having her committed to Danvers State Hospital or they thought it was one of the sites of the Salem bitch hunts so thought she'd feel at home. 84
*******

Oh come on, nothing but the best for Katie.
She'd want McLean in Belmont, designed by Frederick Law Olmstead. Once THE hospital.for the Brahmins (look it up.sheeple). Sylvia Plath and James Taylor (Fire and Rain) received treatment there.

P.s. I am most assuredly not making light of mental illness. Whatever form it may take, it is very real and debilitating. Finding the right treatment is individualized and can be difficult.

Cruisin Just As Fast As She Can Now said...

I can not see kate ever taking her kids to a off the path vacation, to go to see a state hospital or a historic place, like the Salem witch stuff. Kate is more of the beach type, than anything history. So this is probably grifted=free.

*************
There are wonderful beaches around Boston. It could be that they are doing both.

Rhymes with Witch said...

I know the sheeple will put a negative spin on this (giving them the middle finger) but it is a great credit to this blog that posters are willing to share painful parts of their lives to illustrate a point. The support they receive is also wonderful.
I am speaking only for myself, but I can't believe that I'm alone in saying that I feel compassion for everyone's pain, but don't always post about it. Please take it as a given. In some ways, I think you already do, based on the fact that you post about it in the first place. I hope this made sense.

Anonymous said...

Suicide has long been an un-welcome friend of mine, from friends to close family. The only friend closer is depression. I remember at 5 wondering why I was alive, and praying to lay me down to sleep to never awake.

I have had some fun times over the years, and after having dd sought help, which turned me into a zombie for 4 years until I snapped out of it.

I have learned to live comfortably numb, my family cannot understand why I do not laugh at their jokes, or smile at what they smile at. Don't they realise, just my being here today is a great feat, bought by many years of meditation, which tells me there is something worth living for, even if I don't feel it right now?

I have hope, thanks for so many people talking about their own.

The one thing about depression is that it controls your mind, and our minds control everything else. It takes a long time to even realise that maybe something is wrong, because the master chip is flawed, but since we are alone in our minds, don't necessarily realise something is off, and even then, numb is comfortable.

Someone once said.. Crazy people never question their sanity

Because our minds are our driver seats to the world.

my fav song early 90's https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7EpSirtf_E


Thant was better than suicidal

franky

Anonymous said...

I'm becoming concerned that the extensive coverage of Robin Williams' death might result in some people who are depressed choosing to follow suit thinking they have no hope of recovery.

bm

Rhymes with Witch said...

There are wonderful beaches around Boston. It could be that they are doing both. 131

SHHHHHH !! Some secrets SHOULD be kept. Besides, the water is freezing!
(work with me here).

Over In TFW's County said...

Maybe the kids are having her committed to Danvers State Hospital or they thought it was one of the sites of the Salem bitch hunts so thought she'd feel at home. 84

+++++++++++++++++++

She lives in Wernersville. No need to travel far to a hospital, and no, I'm not ridiculing anyone who needs treatment from a mental health professional. It is ironic, though, that she chose Wernersville to call home. The state hospital was founded in the late 1800s, so if she likes history!

If I recall, Danvers State Hospital was torn down several years ago.

Jeanne said...

Thank you to everyone for sharing your stories. Those of us with experience know how real depression is.

Lalalala (116), I think that stopping the meds could have made your son worse. These meds cannot just be stopped safely. They have to be tapered slowly. Those that stop abruptly can have problems. I hope he gets help.

Anonymous said...

Dwindle...

about your friend.

I was the last one to speak to my Aunt, and I KNEW what she was going to do. I begged her to come live with me, think about her children, anything, she said good-bye and hung up. I called my Uncle and told him, he said she would cool off after a few days, she had peeled out in the family car a few minutes before. I begged him to report car as stolen, but nope.

She was found 3 days later in a motel out side of town, housekeeping found her.

All this to say, even knowing can not lways prevent things, once a mind is made up. It is hard to let the guilt go, but ultimately, it is NOT our fault

franky

Pink said...

Is be ever so grateful if this one thread could not bring everything around to discuss that woman. Out of respect. Please.

Anonymous said...

I forgot to mention, aunt was 6 years older than me, more like my sister, as was my other aunt, 5 years older who committed suicide 2 years earlier. Their respective ages were 36 and 39. 5 kids between them

franky

Anonymous said...

TMZ is reporting Lauren Bacall has died after suffering a stroke. She was 89.

bm

rainbowsandunicorns said...

Is be ever so grateful if this one thread could not bring everything around to discuss that woman. Out of respect. Please.

-----
-----

I don't see everything coming around to discussing Kate, but I haven't read all of the posts.

Lalalalala said...

Jeanne said... 137

Thank you to everyone for sharing your stories. Those of us with experience know how real depression is.

Lalalala (116), I think that stopping the meds could have made your son worse. These meds cannot just be stopped safely. They have to be tapered slowly. Those that stop abruptly can have problems. I hope he gets help.

***********************

Jeanne, thank you for your concern and advice. This was years ago and he often said he felt no difference being on or off of them. I just spoke to his cousins about this and they said he's doing great but they would let me know if anything changed. RW's suicide just really shook me up. His estrangement from us is just something I have to come to terms with, I guess.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

I couldn't find the AA photo on Radar but I found it on another site. Honestly, I don't see how you could possibly tell who anyone is in that photo even if you knew them. I think they did keep it confidential by blurring everyone. You can't see hair on anyone's arms in the photo I saw. I see a woman's hands, and they look like the hands of a hundred women I know.

I don't think the photo needs to be published, I believe he went without photo proof, but I don't think it's fair to accuse any news organization of revealing peoples confidential identities. They didn't.

rainbowsandunicorns said...

Anonymous said... 141
TMZ is reporting Lauren Bacall has died after suffering a stroke. She was 89.

-----
-----

Oh, my word. How sad. Two greats in two days.

"You know how to whistle, don't you Steve? You just put your lips together..."

Rhymes with Witch said...

RIP Lauren Bacalll. May you be reunited with Bogie.

Rhymes with Witch said...

I don't think the photo needs to be published, I believe he went without photo proof, but I don't think it's fair to accuse any news organization of revealing peoples confidential identities. They didn't. 144

IMO that is not the point. It is Anonymous for a reason. I blame the person who.took the photograph as well.

Anonymous said...

bm..134

I think the contrary. I think talking about it, flooding all media venues is opening the floodgates to sharing.

I just wrote down what has always been in my head, not out there.

I have been depressed for years, trying to find solution, until then, right now....I feel more empowered to speak, more than ever, because like millions, we all can relate to Robin, because he related it right back to us

THIS, I think, is great way to open more conversation about depression, as a tribute, to him, and ourselves

franky

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

The photographer himself or herself had no business taking the photo. Radar was wrong to condone that by posting the photos.

All I'm saying is that it's inaccurate to say the news organizations revealed identities, which they didn't. It's a blob of faceless people obscured by some kind of table. You wouldn't know if your own mother was in there. Disrespected confidentiality yes. Revealed people's identities, no.

Ex Nurse said...

Admin said....
Revealed people's identities, no.
-------
Most certainly did reveal an identity--Robin 's.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


Admin said....
Revealed people's identities, no.
-------
Most certainly did reveal an identity--Robin 's.

&&&

Other than Robin's obviously, of course! Although in many cases confidentiality expires upon your death. I don't know how AA handles one's death and whether they expect confidentiality to remain even past death. I'm going to assume confidentiality is forever even upon death.

What was said is that you can recognize other people in it. That's simply not true. I prefer to be factual with this kind of thing. It's bad enough that someone even took the photo, provided it to the tabloids, and the tabloids published it. There is no need to embellish the situation with exaggerations about how you can recognize the whole group. You can't.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Robin Williams himself specifically said he was in AA and attended meetings weekly. "Have to. It's good to go" was his quote:

http://www.theguardian.com/film/2010/sep/20/robin-williams-worlds-greatest-dad-alcohol-drugs

So I don't know if confidentiality remains if the person themselves is happy to disclose it and already has disclosed it, four years ago I might add. Like many areas in which the person holds the privilege, confidentiality can be waived if you've decided to reveal it yourself. The other people have given no such interview that I know of, but their identities weren't revealed.

Millicent said...

Cruising shared a quote from Mrs. Doubtfire, which included;
"There are all sorts of different families, Katie. Some families have one mommy, some families have one daddy, or two families. And some children live with their uncle or aunt. Some live with their grandparents, and some children live with foster parents. And some live in separate homes, in separate neighborhoods, in different areas of the country - and they may not see each other for days, or weeks, months... even years at a time. But if there's love, dear... those are the ties that bind, and you'll have a family in your heart, forever. All my love to you, poppet, you're going to be all right... bye-bye."

That was another very important point to the movie that I believe was somewhat ahead of its time: that there are indeed all kinds of families, and what was most important about a family was love, not that it fit into some particular demographic or looked a certain way. Such a moving ending I thought.

RIP Lauren Bacall, another icon from an earlier era. What a truly beautiful, classy, intelligent, talented woman. While I am sorry to hear of her passing, she had a long life and is now reunited with Humphrey Bogart. Today's young women would do themselves a favor if they took a cue from her on how to be one outstanding dame.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

That was another very important point to the movie that I believe was somewhat ahead of its time: that there are indeed all kinds of families, and what was most important about a family was love, not that it fit into some particular demographic or looked a certain way. Such a moving ending I thought.

&&&

I was a child when I first saw that movie and I enjoyed it for its hilarity.

When I watched it again several times as an adult, I started to realize the much deeper and more complex messages of the film. It had so much to say about what makes a family, what love is, what a good parent is, divorce and its affect on kids. It's so well done. It's so hard to pick my favorite movie of his but that's up there.

Ex Nurse said...

This is a link to the publication "Understanding Anonymity". It specifically addresses the issue of the use of media, and that maintaining anonymity is the responsibility of the member. It also defines anonymity in the context of the program. It also said that the decision to break anonymity after death lies with the family.

Millicent said...

nonymous said... 134

I'm becoming concerned that the extensive coverage of Robin Williams' death might result in some people who are depressed choosing to follow suit thinking they have no hope of recovery.

bm
********
I think and hope that it will have the opposite effect. One - they might take some comfort from realizing that they are not alone, that many many people suffer from depression, even people who seem to have it all. Two - maybe this will spur them to talk to someone about how they are feeling, to talk to a friend, relative or mental health professional.

I think it is human nature to shy away from subjects that are scary to us, or when it's a topic we don't know quite how to respond to. It sends a message of "don't talk about it!" But that's exactly the wrong message to send. If we sweep this under the rug, most definitely those suffering from depression will feel even more ostracized from society. It's much better to open the lines of communication and encourage those who need help, to speak out and let people know.

Math Girl said...

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said... 144
I couldn't find the AA photo on Radar but I found it on another site.
---------------------------
If the photo was on a different site, it may have been a different photo or the same photo cropped differently. Also, the information published about it (where and when it was taken) may have been different.

Maybe ROL saw the error of their ways and took theirs down. I just don't think it's fair to say that Jeremy is totally wrong based on what may have been a different picture.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

It specifically addresses the issue of the use of media, and that maintaining anonymity is the responsibility of the member.

&&&

But Robin revealed he was attending himself. The cat was out of the bag, and if it's on the member then he made his decision he wanted to go public with it. He's ALLOWED to do that if he wants to.

While the organization respects anonymity if you want it, if you yourself would like to tell the world you go to AA, you have every right to do so as long as you don't reveal the identity of anyone else. There's nothing in rules that says you are forbidden from discussing your membership if you want to. He chose to do so, and I think his decision should be respected. Maybe he thought it would help people to know he goes and that he wasn't ashamed to say so.

Millicent said...

Dwindle - I am so sorry to hear of your friend's suicide.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

In mine they were obscured by a table so I'm not sure how cropping fixes that to make them more recognizable. I think Radar must have taken their photo down because I can't find it, but maybe it was somehow different. Without seeing it I don't know.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


I think and hope that it will have the opposite effect. One - they might take some comfort from realizing that they are not alone, that many many people suffer from depression, even people who seem to have it all.


&&&

And that you shouldn't be afraid to say you go to AA, weekly, if you darn well want to.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Wait no found the radar photo.

Nope, same photo I saw. You can't see anyone's arms or legs, and you can't tell who anyone is other than the person who has chosen to waive his right to confidentiality in the program, over four years ago. No need to exaggerate. However, they did identify the location of the meeting, which is completely unnecessary.

Fleecing The Sheeple said...

I think Radar must have taken their photo down because I can't find it, but maybe it was somehow different. Without seeing it I don't know.

================

It's still there, as well as the comments. I saw it about two minutes ago.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Franky I'm afraid the mannerisms of the woman are the mannerisms of a million women out there, crossed legs and folded hands, really you could pick out that person? Tons of women sit just like that. I do!

You can't tell who these people are I'm sorry, but that doesn't mean Radar had any right to publish it. I'm sure it was stressful just to know a photo was published even a blurred one. It's not right that they are dragged into this just because Robin is a celeb. He has every right to talk about it himself but not to drag them into it. But then that's part of being a celeb is that you tend to take those around you down with you when the going gets bad even if you never meant to. Another reason not to be a celeb.

Fleecing The Sheeple said...

What was said is that you can recognize other people in it. That's simply not true. I prefer to be factual with this kind of thing.

============

In the ROL photo, you can't tell the identity of those there, but it really isn't the best blurring I've ever seen.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

In the ROL photo, you can't tell the identity of those there, but it really isn't the best blurring I've ever seen.

&&&

Agree. It's more like pixelated. But no you absolutely can't tell. A full blur of the entire head, hair and body would be better, even better don't publish it at all. It's not their finest moment.

Anonymous said...

Admin...Yes, yes I could

Just as I can pick out a friend walking down the crowded Montrel streets, just by they way they carry themselves.

The mere fact SOMEONE took a pic in a group that was supposed to be anon offends me to no end, and I know addicts, one whiff and they will run, back to the shadows for fear.

But I have actually recognised a friend on a youtube because he had a habit of rubbing his left-hnd finger...they didn't blur that out

franky

a breach is a breach, then all confidence goes out the window

Anonymous said...

Have you ever lived in a small town, or , within a large one....belonged to a small community?

One that knows everyone?, Now base that on trust, as 12-steps need...now see your trust splashed all over tabloids, just because they can.

The worst thing is...those in the pix may not be recognisable to us, but they are to them, and you can bet they are looking.

So much for anonymity, I hope those the figure out who sold the pic and make him pay.

It is hard enough to seek help, see a celeb, harder still.

See photos from mettings, worst still....blurred or not

Admin, I am right on this one

franky

Mel said...

My heart breaks for his children and wife. So, so hard for them.

Sending good thoughts to the rest of you, too, who have had a suicide in your lives.

We were lucky in our family that my brother heard the voice change, and recognized immediately what was happening. Thank goodness that he was in time. Although it took two hospitalizations his child is now on a good path. For which we are thankful.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Okk Franky I'll take your word for it.

This is not a small town. I'm from a small town. Couple hundred folks. This is a huge city. San Francisco. I would not be able to recognize someone based on their watch and the fact that they crossed their legs. Even if it were my own mother. Half of the women in San Francisco have that haircut. Just to be safe, they never should have posted it in the first place.

Starz22 said...

Awareness to how serious depression can be is a great thing. What bothers me is, some of the people on news shows were quick to bring up the fact that he was an addict. After 20 years of being sober some were quick to say we wont know for sure until the toxicology report comes back. We don't know why Robin went to re-had in July.

Did anyone think that going to a re-hab center was the only place he could go to just be himself? Where he could just be? Some people can't just be themselves even when they are with family and friends. Maybe this is where he needed to go so he could just be off for once. The man was always on...always expected to be funny and make people laugh. What ever the reason, we'll never know.
The man was a genius, and the world is a sadder place without him.

AuntieAnn said...

I would like to say, and I do mean this sincerely - because it IS a touchy subject and it has affected so many people on so many levels - I would love to have heard Robin get up and talk at these AA meetings. Because he was among other addicts and shared that commonality with them, I'll bet he was a total riot and made everyone there feel better about themselves. He had that kind of magic. The man touched the lives of everyone he met.

NJGal51 said...

Had Jeremy not said anything I would never have known about the AA picture. Although he wanted us to boycott ROL it seems to have had the opposite effect...at least with me. I agree with Admin that the only one recognizable in the picture is RW.

My heart goes out to all of you who have been touched by depression or suicide.

AuntieAnn said...

White Organza (95)and Crusin' (124) - you're welcome. It's a great film and as Call Me Crazy said the cinemotography is absolutely stunning.

btw, I read a blog about that movie this afternoon. I share the 'sediments' of the writer, who said it far better than I ever could.

http://www.bustle.com/articles/35358-robin-williams-what-dreams-may-come-performance-was-transcendent-far-too-relevant

Sleepless In Seattle said...

Because he was among other addicts and shared that commonality with them, I'll bet he was a total riot and made everyone there feel better about themselves. He had that kind of magic. The man touched the lives of everyone he met.

-----------------------------

Yes, but in the end the real tragedy is that although he could make others feel better about themselves, he couldn't do the same for himself.

Starz22 said...

#170 AuntieAnn

No disrespect intended. You'r post validates what I was trying to say. Robin had no place to go to be just him...a man with serious problems...problems that were eating away at him. Maybe he didn't want to entertain the other people in the AA meetings...maybe he just needed to hear that they understood him...understood where he was coming from and why he was feeling like he was. Even if he did tell jokes and made everyone else feel better about themselves...he was still alone not being able to get the help that HE needed.

lukebandit said...

I had a 2nd cousin I'll call C. who's dad was a drunk, drove constantly drunk. He just refused to take responsibility for his son and he was an attorney. C's grandparents lived right in front of the middle school. It would of been great if C could of went to school there and played football, all the sports and walk across the street to go to school. He would of been there only for supper and sleeping.

But. No. His grandfather didn't want him there and my aunt wouldn't put her foot down for C. All that kid felt was rejection. My mother wanted to take him in with us, but my dad said no. He was a great kid! No problem. All he wanted was love! Even my brother was jealous. They were all in the car and C. was feeling down and my mother put her arm around him to comfort him and my brother did not like that at all. I thought it was horrible what my brother did to him.

Then as he gets older, he gets on drugs to numb the pain from his childhood. Then he finally got off of them and started working for his grandfather who had moved out to a farm outside of the city. He was fixing up four wheelers and he was really doing good. But, here comes the wrench. His uncle, who had a great job in the big city all of a sudden was on disability and he was functioning but couldn't do his job at work.

That uncle of his, my first cousin TOOK that poor kids job away from him because he needed money to pay for his 5 kids to 3 different women! C. hadn't even got married or had kids! He immediately went back on drugs and not long after that he killed himself. He hung himself in the barn that was close to the main road in town. It was a shotgun barn where there was no door in the front or the back. You can see all the way through and the wind whips through there really good!

They didn't cut the rope down for a long time after he died. When the wind would blow it would swing and it was the talk of the town. People couldn't believe it. Finally someone cut it down. As soon as C. was pronounced, his dad, my first cousin, that day like 30 minutes after, went to the insurance co. where our first cousin worked and was filing a CLAIM on C.

My aunt refused to buy her grandson a suit to be buried in. She told C.'s dad to go get a suit out of storage. Had mold on it. These people had plenty of money, huge property. C. was such a good kid. All he wanted was to be accepted. They just hated the boy's mother and took it out on him.

Their bad harvest came in. My uncle, aunt, C's dad, his brother, not the one who took C's job are all dead in a short period of time. Before my uncle and aunt died, I was babysitting with my grandmother there taking care of her for a couple of hours and I was sitting on the couch with the newspaper reading it. All of a sudden, I felt like someone was watching me. I eased down the paper and there was a 8 x 10 framed photo of C. in a sweater on the cabinet shelf, just looking and sweetly smiling at me. I hadn't ever saw that picture, ever. It really felt like he was in the room with me.

I haven't even thought of this for a very very long time until reading these posts and I remembered. Bless everyone's hearts who are affected by mental illness or loved ones. Maybe TCM will do a RW marathon this Sat. and LB on Sun.

Anonymous said...

Seriously Admin?

The fact that I come from a small town has honed my instincts

I was safer in a city, but my town taught me to always be aware, always look around

franky

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Well I feel better now. They showed a club of RW on Larry King and would't you know it, he made FUN of the anonymous part of AA.

They were talking about his alcoholism and his group support, and when Larry said yes AA, Robin jumps in and says, "Shhh, don't say it!" Lol.

Then he said there are people in that group who have done things that make me feel Amish. LOL!!!! Oh Robin, RIP. RIP. RIP.

Ex Nurse said...

Admin said...
While the organization respects anonymity if you want it, if you yourself would like to tell the world you go to AA, you have every right to do so as long as you don't reveal the identity of anyone else. There's nothing in rules that says you are forbidden from discussing your membership if you want to. He chose to do so, and I think his decision should be respected. Maybe he thought it would help people to know he goes and that he wasn't ashamed to say so.
______
The use of a camera, or any other type of media device, is, in and of itself, a breach of the anonymity of that group, as defined by AA. It isn't about confidentiality, as used in a legal sense. i'm not being argumentative--I am saying that in the context of a 12 step group, anonymity was broken--not in any other context. if you will take the time to read the brochure, I think you will gain a better understanding of how important the principle is in recovery. It is required for the safety of the members of the group. if you want to know more about how it works, there are many open AA meetings easily found on the website.

I can"t stress enough how important this is to the recovery community,

And, while every member decides how public they are about their addiction, it is a breach of anonymity to identify a specific program. When members choose to speak about a specific program, they are asked to be unidentified, except by first names, and to have images and voices altered so as to be unrecognizable. AA is based on members coming as a result of attraction, not promotion.

In the recovery rooms, there are no celebrities--just people who are brought together for a common goal of recovery from the effects of their own, or another person's addiction.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


Alcoholics ANONYMOUS

should remain so

&&&

And so it did. No one was outed but Robin, who had already chosen years ago to out himself.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

-I am saying that in the context of a 12 step group, anonymity was broken--not in any other context.


&&&

I'm not and never have been disagreeing with you the the photographer violated that and Radar condoned that by using the photo, so no need to keep debating the point. The only point I took an issue with is the statement that Radar outed a bunch of other people. That is NOT true.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

I can"t stress enough how important this is to the recovery community,

&&&

Not everyone. Some people want to talk about it. For those who want anonymity that should be respect. For those that don't, like Robin, that too should be respected. Like another poster said there is a fine line here where you don't want to make people feel it should be anonymous because it's shameful. IF you want to talk about it, go for it.

I have had many clients who are addicts who want to talk about it. Many of them end up becoming leaders in these organizations themselves. It doesn't bother some people to talk about it.

AA is one way to deal with addiction. It's very religious based. I have had many clients who didn't like the program and were more comfortable at other programs that had different philosophies on recovery. They have been successful there too.

Circling the drain said...

The Eleventh Tradition of AA:

Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, and films.

I cannot emphasize enough what a horrible breach the ROL photo of an AA meeting is. That this photo
violated the anonymity of any AA member, celebrity or not, outed or
not, is an absolute disgrace. On a par with violating a doctor-patient, lawyer-client, clergyman-parishioner confidentiality. Or selling a photo of a dead celebrity. Pixels and blurring don't matter. Arguing that you can't tell for sure who's in the picture is so beside the point. It's just wrong.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...


No disrespect intended. You'r post validates what I was trying to say. Robin had no place to go to be just him...a man with serious problems...problems that were eating away at him.


&&&

I don't know how he was at those meetings but from what everyone has been saying the man just couldn't turn it off. Being funny and out there was who he was. Maybe that's how he tried to deal with his pain. I know I really did appreciate it but at the same time it could be too much for me sometimes. Like I think Bitchy said, I found his standup too crazy and in your face. I don't need bam-bam-bam all the time but that's just who he was. I remember he would just be covered in sweat. I like many of his films where he was more controlled.

I think his brain was wired differently than most of us. We may never understand it. I believe the way he was wired was tapping into something the rest of us couldn't access. A beautiful mind as they say. Whether he could turn that off and act more "normal" whatever that means, I do not know. Ultimately maybe that's what happened--even being how he was wasn't helping anymore. Please know though that people are really trying to make an effort to understand it and be sensitive. On CNN one of the reporters said he was battling demons. She got a flurry of tweets in response saying that describing mental illness as "demons" is confusing and misrepresents what's really going on. She immediately apologized and said you're right that's not accurate or sensitive. I think that's something.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

Yes I agree Radar should't have published it not it's not the same as violating a lawyer-client relationship since the client holds the privilege and if a client wants to release whatever info they want about whatever they may do so unless there is some sort of gag order, which isn't that common. It sounds much more sacred than that.

Jeremy said...

The ROL photo is still up, and you can also access it thru ROL twitter. Since ROL has 93k followers, I don't take responsibility for anyone noticing the pic just because I wrote about it. And ALL the twitter are replies are of disgust and a pledge to unfollow ROL. I never said that they breached the confidentially. I said "could" as in could possibly happen. (By the way, Radar is saying they found the picture on the internet, but there is no credit to any source) I said some of those people could be identified by people who know them. And if I were one of those people with a blurred face, trying to keep my disease confidential, as is my right, I would be pretty panicked about now. Just for the turmoil ROL is putting those several people thru is horrible. And there is no need to publish the picture. It is well known he battled demons and sought help. We don't need proof. We don't need to know every detail of his death. The people sitting at that meeting, battling a disease, don't need to wonder who might recognize them.

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said...

I don't understand why Radar thinks how they got the photo has anything to do with anything. They point is they obtained it and made the poor decision to post it.

I just read the transcript of the press conference and I have just as much of a problem with that as anything else, though no one seems to have mentioned that. The details were terrible and the family doesn't deserve that. I understand there are sunshine laws and if people want to read police reports and eventual coroner's reports they may do so, but there was no reason to go into that level of detail on live TV.

Sleepless In Seattle said...

I am saying that in the context of a 12 step group, anonymity was broken--not in any other context.

--------------------

I guess I am missing something here. How was anonymity broken if no faces were shown, and nobody's personal information was published?

I agree that it was a despicable thing to do, and that the photographer and ROL should have their hands smacked, but saying this was a breach of confidentiality for anyone other than Robin...I just don't see it.

Sleepless In Seattle said...

The details were terrible and the family doesn't deserve that. I understand there are sunshine laws and if people want to read police reports and eventual coroner's reports they may do so, but there was no reason to go into that level of detail on live TV.

-------------------

Yes, yes, yes! I made the mistake of reading it. I thought there was going to be information about a suicide note...if one was left (not the contents) and instead I read about how he was found. I am sorry that I did. Now I have this picture in my head, and I really didn't want to go there.

Sleepless In Seattle said...

Or selling a photo of a dead celebrity. Pixels and blurring don't matter. Arguing that you can't tell for sure who's in the picture is so beside the point. It's just wrong.

---------------

Who is arguing this? I haven't' read any comments here where anyone said that it's fine and dandy to post this photo. It was wrong. Period.

NJGal51 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Thank you Jeremy, you get it

franky

Anonymous said...

Admin...

I would rather read that Robin first tried to slit his wrists ( Horizontally is not where the veins are, and just is messy unless in a tub)

Then he took the time too figure out using a closet and belt, without a chair. This is comforting to me, because he thought things through, and the final descision was his. He coulda opted out in the first min BTW, I know, because I too have researched this.

If I make that final descision, I too shall be fully clothed and alone.

I really get him.
franky

Penny said...

No offense, admin., but unless you've been in those rooms for the right reasons can you understand what ex-nurse and Franky are trying to say.

Taking any picture in a meeting, even if it's not published or blurry, will prevent people who need help to get help. It's already scary to admit there is a problem. Thinking your picture might be taken is the biggest affront to the entire organization and their principles. It doesn't matter if people were identifiable or not.

Also, AA has no leaders and it's not entirely "religion based." A higher power can be JC, Allah, Buddah or your Cat. You need to believe in a power stronger than yourself, not a religion. I know atheists who used "the Earth" as their higher power.

JMO said...

Circling the drain said... 184
The Eleventh Tradition of AA:

Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, and films.

I cannot emphasize enough what a horrible breach the ROL photo of an AA meeting is. That this photo
violated the anonymity of any AA member, celebrity or not, outed or
not, is an absolute disgrace. On a par with violating a doctor-patient, lawyer-client, clergyman-parishioner confidentiality. Or selling a photo of a dead celebrity. Pixels and blurring don't matter. Arguing that you can't tell for sure who's in the picture is so beside the point. It's just wrong.
---------------------------
I have to agree with you. The whole premise of AA/NA is "Anonymous." Even though some idiot chose to take a photo of RW and other faces were blurred out does not make it right.

Granted RW was open about his addiction and seeking recovery, but his right to Anonymous in meetings was ignored, and not okay. In my opinion, whoever opened this Pandora box should be banned from any further meetings. What was the point, and how does this honor the tradition of Anonymous? Slippery slope. JMO

localyocul said...

Realitytvkids.com (Administrator) said... 188

I just read the transcript of the press conference and I have just as much of a problem with that as anything else, though no one seems to have mentioned that. The details were terrible and the family doesn't deserve that. I understand there are sunshine laws and if people want to read police reports and eventual coroner's reports they may do so, but there was no reason to go into that level of detail on live TV.

(((

I agree. I was listening to it live and couldn't believe the detail they were going into. Then I had to wonder if the family said to release the details to avoid rumors and misinformation floating about? IOW get the truth out (which was horrible enough) to avoid even more sensational gossip?

Tucker's Mom said...

Dwindle said... 106
*******
I'm sorry for your loss, and for the pain that you are left with. I think it was a very good decision to insulate yourself from the details.
While it's tragic that a person takes their own life, the people remaining here, on Earth, are left to suffer with the aftermath.

NJGal51 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tucker's Mom said...

I was shocked and horrified that the authorities released such detailed information about Robin's body, when found.
Why? Why did they need to say how he was found?
That's an image that no one needs in their head, and it's just no respectful at all.

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